Every now and then I get a major reminder of how different my life is now, (busy, but boring and surprisingly complicated!) like when I got a surprise call from a high school friend who was hitchhiking from Chicago back to California after spending weeks backpacking around Europe. I rarely get visitors from anyone besides family here in flyover country, so I was excited to try to get together with him.

Planning a simple get together can be complicated if you have young kids though. It was 5:30 p.m. and he wanted to make plans for dinner. We just finished dinner, I explained (as I tried cradling my cellphone against my ear while scrubbing down a pissed-off Oliver who was screaming and thrashing around). What about later on that night he wanted to know? Well, Chris had class and Oliver goes to bed around 6:30 p.m., and I couldn't make any other arrangements to watch Oliver so last-minute. Then the suggestion came to meet after Chris's class. Well, I'm 37 weeks pregnant, I continued, and I didn't know how much fun I'd be, say, past 7:00 p.m. The 37 weeks part meant nothing to him, so I tried again.

"I'm three weeks away from my due date," I said.

"Oh, so you're about to pop!" he excitedly responded.

Later he learned he could borrow a bike from the friend he was staying with, and the next day he biked the six or seven miles to my house (and got lost about 15 times on his way) to have dinner with us.

I hoped that he really did understand that I wasn't trying to be difficult and that I honestly did want to see him, but that life with a toddler and a baby on the way really had become restrictive, even for a stay-at-home mom who technically had no "plans" for the days in question.

We caught each other up on the last five years of our lives since we last saw each other. He had relocated across the country and worked on Obama's campaign, among many jobs he can easily put in the "cool life experiences" category. He quit his latest job to go to Europe for a second chance with an ex-girlfriend and now back home, plans to bartend in San Francisco while mulling over grad school and job opportunities. I introduced him to Chris and Oliver ("A little Partenheimer! he cried in near disbelief) and gave him a tour of our house and basement renovation. I told him the story of how Chris and I met and about the road from working-world professional to stay-at-home mom. We are leading vastly different lives, but we were able to share an excitement about what the other was doing.

I had been worried my friend would think I was inflexible or had lost my free spirit, but I think he totally got it. He appreciated the life and family Chris and I had created for ourselves. On his way out the door, he said it was just a matter of finding the right woman and then he'll be calling me for advice on all the kid stuff. I'll have a lot to share, but until then, I'm also happy to live vicariously through his vagabond lifestyle.