Oliver is Seven!

The boy who made me a mother turned seven. When I snuggle with him at bedtime, I tease him about how I once was able to bath him in the bathroom sink. And now he's an artistically-talented, intelligent, social, Lego and Star Wars-loving little boy.

Oliver devours chapter books...as fast as we can read them to him. He's read every book in the Clementine series, is waiting for the upcoming release of a new Diary of a Wimpy Kid book and he just discovered Geronimo Stilton, which he received as a birthday present.  Oliver hasn't learned to read yet and I keep having to take deep breaths and remind myself that students in immersion programs read later and when they do, they can read in both languages. More importantly, he loves books and he loves being read to, something I hope continues even after he can read to himself.

At least the reading balances out the Minecraft.  I only vaguely knew what Minecraft was (I could tell you a video game, but nothing more) and didn't think Oliver knew anything about it, so I was taken aback when Chris returned from a trip to the cabin with the boys with a new Playstation and Minecraft.  It doesn't matter if Oliver had been unfamiliar with Minecraft or not, because he's obsessed with it now. There's part of me that admittedly enjoys a bit of piece and quiet when he disappears to the basement to play, but when I have to cut him off, oh my oh my.  He's a textbook example of the addicting qualities of screen time.

And oh my gosh, the Legos. That's another obsession of his, but one I consider much healthier, at least for his development.  It's not necessarily healthier for my sanity. I'm engaged in a never-ending battle to contain the Legos.  I can't vacuum without doing a detailed survey of the floor and when I try to clear out what look like piles of partially-built, unidentifiable creations from Oliver's room, I'm met with cries of "That's my [term I've never heard of and probably comes from Start Wars]!"

As happens every fall, I push Oliver into the next size of clothing even though they're a tad too big for him.  Last week I swapped out his 5T shorts and size 6 t-shirts for size 6 pants and size 7 long-sleeve shirts.  He's short and skinny, so his shirts hang a little long on him and we have to cinch the elastic bands on the inside of his jeans as tight as they can go.

Oliver continues to flash a smile full of baby teeth. I think he's starting to wish he would lose some teeth like all his friends.  I know it will happen soon enough though. Until then, he's my big boy with a smile full of baby teeth.

We signed Oliver up for a parks and rec league soccer program because he enjoyed playing during recess at school last year and we wanted to have him in an outdoor activity before starting on indoor activities for the winter. Not surprisingly, it took him awhile to warm up to it and even while he eventually had fun, he never loved it. Because of his birthday, he was in a group with older kids and he didn't know any of them. He's an active kid, but I think he likes to enjoy activities on his own terms.

An activity Oliver is loving more and more, despite his humble beginnings, is swimming. He is so much more comfortable in the water and takes every opportunity to go swimming. Even though his last formal lesson was this past spring, he has since learned to swim short distances. He can also now jump in the water, even if it's well over his head, like when he jumps off the dock or the back of the boat into the lake (with his life jacket on of course). For a kid who was once terrified of getting his face wet, (and who still isn't thrilled about having to wash his hair) this is a huge!

Oliver  got up on water skis for the first time this summer, although he still needs to develop more balance and strength before he'll be able to cover any sort of distance. Chris was Oliver's age when he first learned to ski, so this milestone made him one proud dad.

And he's (just about) up!

The picky eating and power struggles over food continue with Oliver.  Intellectually, I know not to engage in power struggles with my children, but it's hard not to when your child truly enjoys so few foods and there's little room for compromise. Dinnertime with four little ones is admittedly not often a very enjoyable experience at our house, but I do take comfort in the fact that we still eat dinner together most nights of the week and hopefully that's the memory that prevails.

These dinnertime power struggles are a few of many examples of the little disappointments or problems that can send Oliver into a spiral of emotions and negative talk. My psychologist friend calls them "automatic negative thoughts." It's hard as a parent to watch my child melt down over something so trivial and talk negatively because even though I know he'll eventually calm down and be back to his happy-go-lucky self, in the moment, he really feels those feelings.

I'm believe strongly that children (and adults!) need proper sleep at night and that children need more hours of sleep than we think. We've always had early bedtimes for our children because they, especially Oliver, need it. As a young child, Oliver was not the kid who could skip a nap or stay up past his bedtime because he melted down. Although I still think his bedtime needs to be 7:00 p.m., it's so difficult to eat dinner at 5:30 p.m. and still have enough time for the kids to wind down, go through the bedtime routine and be in bed an hour and a half later. On the rare nights we achieve that, Oliver still has trouble falling asleep. 

Oliver Starts First Grade

And just like that, summer is over.  Oliver started first grade today. We sent him off with a brand-new backpack and a beautiful Schultuete Nina had made him.  I think Oliver was bummed summer was over and possibly a little jealous of his siblings who haven't started school yet and are getting an extra week and a half of summer, but overall, he seemed happy to be back. 

Our au pair, Nina, with Oliver and the traditional German Schultuete she made him.

This year's first day of school was vastly more relaxed and tear-free compared with last year's. There's much less for Oliver to be anxious about since he knows the school. Unlike last year when there were very few familiar faces, he now has friends, including one particularly close friend who's in the same class this year.

The chaos of the first day of school was also alleviated by the school's decision to start kindergartners two days later, which meant fewer parents and children packing the hallways, and fewer children in tears. The morning felt unusually calm, and actually, quite anti-climatic.

We helped Oliver find his seat and when I asked if it was okay if his dad and I left, he quietly answered no.  Although he wasn't crying, I could tell he was nervous. His mood changed when he saw his good friend Atticus arrive and once they were seated together and laughing and catching up, Oliver indicated we could leave. A friend who dropped off her daughter right after we left reported back that Oliver was all smiles and excitedly waved at her and motioned for his classmate to join his group at the table. 

Despite being a little nervous when he first entered his new classroom, Oliver radiated confidence by the time we left.

Oliver's first grade teacher is Frau Zinnow, a native German. Parents of older students think very highly of her and my hope is that Oliver thrives academically and socially in her classroom.

A Baby-Toothed Smile

At age six and a half, Oliver still hasn't lost any of his baby teeth.  I'm not entirely surprised given that his teeth were late to come in. On his first birthday, he had half a tooth. I don't know when I got my first tooth, but I did lose my first tooth quite late, so perhaps Oliver is going to take after me.

I love Oliver's smile and it recently dawned on me that my time with this beautiful smile of his is running out. I know he can't keep those baby teeth forever, but oddly, I'm quite attached to them. I remember when he started getting teeth and how I mourned his toothless grin. Losing those same teeth is another reminder that he's growing up. 

Oliver Update: 6.5 Years

We recently met with Oliver's teachers for the spring parent-teacher conferences and every teacher had nothing but glowing compliments. His drama teacher even referred to him as his rock in a class that's gotten a reputation for being quite rambunctious. But that's his personality - he likes structure and rules and he thrives in environments where there are rules. His kindergarten teacher talked about how well he's doing academically, but also about how well he behaves.  He's the calm child who helps his classmates and participates.  She was shocked when I shared some stories of the Oliver we see at home.

Because at home we see a kid with energy to burn.  It's a continual challenge to help Oliver constructively channel that energy and with a good attitude while he's at it. I'm glad he's super well-behaved in school, but I wish Chris and I could experience more of the inquisitive, friendly, excited-about-life, curious, artistic and helpful boy his teachers get to see for hours every school day. 

Luckily, since he's always over at our neighbor Paloma's house, we don't actually have to parent him that often.  Just kidding! But he does spend a lot of time over there.  Whenever we get home after being out, I haven't even turned the ignition off in the car before he's asking if he can go play with Paloma.  If it's right after school, Oliver wants to meet Paloma at her bus stop, so I joke that Paloma's mom could outsource bus stop pick-up to Oliver.  Paloma just might be the first person he thinks of when he wakes up because he immediately wants to run next door.  Unfortunately, our family wakes up early and Paloma's does not, so we make Oliver wait until what we consider a reasonable hour. A couple of times he's been turned away.

Anyway, those two get along so well and share a similar sense of humor.  They love to play Legos, Star Wars and video games, like Lego Dimensions. They're very creative together and come up with elaborate games of super heroes. 

For all the energy Oliver has, one quiet activity he can partake in is drawing.  Chris finally bought him his own set of markers and crayons and a sketch pad that he doesn't  have to share with his siblings.  I had hoped the sketch pad would cut down on the pieces of paper with various states of completed artwork that are lying around his room. Every couple of days I do a clean sweep and recycle most of it, but I'm waiting for the day I accidentally recycle something he considered a masterpiece. 

Oliver recently re-learned to ride his bike without training wheels.  He had barely mastered this new skill at the end of last summer, so by this spring rolled around, he had forgotten. So he wanted nothing to do with his training-wheel-less bike and instead tried riding his siblings' bikes, including Kiera's balance bike that is really too small for him. This of course caused lots of fights, most of which Celina was left trying to mediate since they occurred right after school as the kids took advantage of a last chance to play outside before dinner.  

Chris, the parent in this duo with the most patience, took Oliver out to reteach him how to ride without training wheels and surprising to us all, it took Oliver all of 10 minutes to get the hang of it and feel confident enough to bike a couple of laps around the block.  Later on Oliver, Soren and I took their bikes to the path down by the river where they biked and I jogged.  Oliver was happy as could be to pedal on ahead as I plodded along at my own pace. 

Oliver shows no signs yet of losing any teeth.  His baby teeth were late to come in (he had only a half a tooth by his first birthday) and I didn't lose my first tooth until I was in first grade, so maybe he's just destined to lose that first tooth late. Honestly, that's fine with me. He's got such a cute smile I've been admiring for a few years now and I'm not quite ready to have that change with the loss of teeth.  

Oliver weights not much more than 40 pounds and he's currently in 6T tops and 5T pants. However, just the other day I looked over at him and noticed that his pants are suddenly looking a little short on him. 

School Pictures

Oliver's school pictures came back today.  These are the ones I had stressed over because he's not super cooperative with smiling for the camera and the day they were taken, I was dealing with Matteo's newly-broken arm and possible surgery, so that whole day was a stressful blur.  I couldn't even remember what Oliver had worn or if I had brushed his hair. 

I peeled open the envelope and found a beautiful picture of my six-year-old little boy.  Except, he suddenly didn't look so little. He looked so grown up!  How did that happen?  It was just weeks ago he was a nervous-wreck starting school. 

In my in-law's house are framed pictures of Chris' and Andy's school pictures from kindergarten through 12th grade. As shocked as I am by how grown up Oliver looks in his kindergarten picture, I can't imagine what he'll look like as a high schooler.

Oliver at Age Six

I've been told that kindergarten is a big growth year.  Sure, us parents make a big deal out of it because it's symbolic of our "babies" becoming bonafide big kids, but entering school really forces them to grow up.  Oliver now walks himself to his classroom, has a locker and takes an hour-long bus ride home with students as old as eighth grade.  While his kindergarten classroom provides a secure  home base, he has some classes in other rooms of the building, eats his lunch in the cafeteria and attends after-school activities in yet another location.  More is expected of him socially, academically and maturity-wise.

Oliver shows a lot more independence at home.  He can dress himself and he's even started taking showers.  He can put an entire Lego set together by himself.  As long as one of the neighbor kids is outside, he can be outside without Chris or me.  We trust him that he'll follow the rules for playing outside without us. 

Despite Oliver's budding independence, change is still hard for him.  Routine is really comforting for him.  Just as soon as he started to get the hang of the school routine, he learned he was going on a field trip and that prospect had him anxious for days.  The same anxiety cropped up on the first day his after-school arts and crafts group would be meeting because he didn't know exactly where in the school building they would meet and then I would be picking him up instead of him taking the bus home, and while he liked that idea, me picking him up still threw off his routine. 

For the first time in his life, there's a big chunk of Oliver's day we don't have vision to.  Luckily, he's doing a surprising good job of reporting back to us on his day.  Some of the details don't necessarily add up, like the classmate who moved out of his classroom, supposedly to eighth grade, (his teacher told us later the child was moved to another kindergarten classroom to balance out the class sizes) but we nonetheless love hearing about his day and what's important to him, like what he had for lunch and who he plays with at recess.

Oliver continues to be really into arts and crafts.  When I told him he could choose from sports or arts and crafts for his after-school activity, Oliver chose the latter. Art is one of his favorite subjects (along with Gym).  For his birthday, his grandmother took him out to dinner and then to a craft store to let him pick out his own birthday present.  In a surprise twist, he came home with a chemistry set!

To the delight of his parents who love to play board games, Oliver not only enjoys them, but is finally at an age where we can teach him to play.  We played a lot of Monopoly Deal on our trip to North Dakota and when we got home, he discovered the Monopoly game I got for my eight birthday.  We think he likes games so much because he's such a rule-follower.  

Oliver is very well-behaved at school, and his teacher called him a sweetheart.  He received his first birthday party invitation from a classmate who had invited only the girls in the class, and Oliver, because he's the nicest boy in the class according to the little girl's mother.  These moments make me beam as a mom.  Then at home he pushes the limits of our parenting abilities and continues to humble Chris and me into accepting that six years later, we're still figuring out this parenting thing and will never have all the answers. 

We've got one stubborn kid who is full of opinions and energy and sometimes raw emotion.  But Oliver also has a tender, emotional side to him. He wants to cuddle with us while we read him a book and he can't go to bed without a kiss goodnight or let me leave for work without a final hug and waving to me from the window. He's incredibly creative and is often found in the midst of a new project or drawing.

Oliver is Off to Kindergarten

It's a new era for our family.  As of today, we officially have a school-age child.  Sending any child off to kindergarten is a big deal, but being that we were a family with four non-school-age children, it's kind of a relief to send one child off to school.  I know I'm very much in the minority when I answer with an honest no to everyone who's asked me if I'm sad about Oliver starting kindergarten.  With his fall birthday making him older for his grade, he's more than ready for something more challenging. 

We had applied to both our neighborhood school and the Twin Cities German Immersion School (TCGIS) and were very lucky to get spots in both schools.  The day after we got home from China, we received the call from TCGIS that Oliver has gotten a spot in the lottery, and even though the school was our top choice and I should have been jumping with joy, the best I could do in my jet-lagged state was politely thank them for the call. I had no idea how lucky we had really been.  A friend with an older child at TCGIS informed me that 110 children were wait-listed and that this might be the first time in the school's history that some children never make it off the waitlist.

So off to German school Oliver was headed.  Our first morning was pretty hectic as we prepared for seven of us to get out the door in the morning.  Chris and I arranged to take the morning off of work so we could take Oliver to school, and of course Celina and the rest of the kids had to come too.

Our au pair made Oliver's first day of German school special by making him a Schultuete, which all German children receive on their first day of school.  (They receive theirs in first grade since kindergarten is part of preschool in Germany and first grade is considered the start of official schooling.) The cones are filled with school supplies and lots of chocolates and candies.  As a special treat, Oliver's Schultuete included some German chocolate Celina had brought from home for this purpose. 

Once we got to school, we found our way to the wing of the building with the kindergarten and first grade classrooms.  It was already hot and humid, even so early in the morning, and it was even more stifling in a hallway packed with anxious parents and anxious children.  We found Oliver's locker and then walked him into his classroom to meet his new teacher. 

I was thrilled when I found out that Oliver would be in Frau Suter's class because his teacher and I actually go way back.  We met when we were counselors at the Concordia Language Villages, when I knew her as Uschi, her German camp name, and we not only taught together, but were even co-counselors in the same cabin. I really admired her for how well she spoke German and her ability to connect with our campers.  We lost touch over the years and I had no idea she became a teacher, let alone at TCGIS.  The four summers I taught at Waldsee seem like a lifetime ago since I was single and childless then, so it's both surreal and awesome to have Uschi, I mean, Frau Suter, end up being my child's kindergarten teacher. 

We knew Oliver was nervous, but he held it together until it was time for us to leave and then the tears started.  My friend's daughter, who is in first grade, tried comforting him by telling him that she was sad last year too when her parents had to leave, "but the rest of the day was pretty awesome."  With that ringing endorsement of kindergarten, I decided it was a good time to give my final kisses goodbye and assure Oliver that he would be okay.  As much as I had not been sad about Oliver starting kindergarten, I was suddenly on the verge of tears, especially has my crying boy thrust both palms in my face to receive two "kissing hands".  We had read The Kissing Hand the night before about a little racoon whose mom kisses one of his hands so he could take her love with him when he went to school.  Oliver had informed me last night that he was going to ask me to kiss both hands so he wouldn't have to worry about forgetting which hand contained my kiss. 

When Oliver hopped off the bus this afternoon, I was relieved that he was in good spirits.  As one can expect from a five-year-old, we didn't get a whole lot out of him about what he thought of his first day.  Everyone was nice, but he couldn't remember anyone's names.  They sang a "hello" song, but he couldn't remember the words.  He learned the German word Tschuess, which means goodbye.  He kind of liked lunch, and rattled off everything that came in the school's hot lunch today, but then later begged me for a cool lunchbox so he could pack his own lunch.  The drama teacher walked them out to the bus and the older kids aren't as good at listening as the younger kids because his teacher asked them to move out of the way in the hallway and she had to ask them three times.  Despite the vague report from his day, I think it overall went well. 

Oliver Update: 5.5 Years

Back in the fall, we didn't feel Oliver was ready for kindergarten emotionally, and with his late September birthday, Chris and I had no intention of making him one of the youngest in his class.  So we kept him in his preschool for a third year and have watched him flourish in so many ways.  However, Oliver has always been a strong-willed, stubborn kid (gets that from both his parents), and let's just say some of these characteristics have been, um, extra challenging in the last couple of months.  He's gotten bossy with his siblings, is always getting himself into trouble because he can't keep his hands to himself and still throws tantrums over seemingly inconsequential things.  Then it dawned on me that Oliver probably needs to go to kindergarten.  He's ready for the academic challenge of all-day school, five days a week, he could benefit from a break from his younger siblings and he could stand to be humbled by being the little guy on campus after ruling the roost over here at our house. 

This is the conundrum with fall babies.  They're not quite ready for one reason or another in the fall, but halfway through the year they are suddenly READY.  It's too bad we couldn't have sent him to school in January instead of having to wait for next September.

But that all means that come fall, Oliver will be really ready to go to school.  Just two years ago the thought of kindergarten literally made him cry.  Thinking about riding the bus or being away from home all day simply scared him.  He's grown so much since then.  He's become more confident and out-going, and just like his parents, he likes school and learning. 

Kindergarten readiness aside, there's so much Oliver can do.  He can take a Lego instruction booklet and build the Lego creation by himself, with just a bit of quality control from Dad.  While I pushed his three siblings in the stroller, Oliver rode his bike alongside me on the two-mile round trip to the grocery store.  He is mastering the monkey bars and no longer needs anyone to push him on the swings.  He's learned to dress himself and bursts into our bedroom with pride in the morning to show us that he's completely dressed. He knows (almost) all his letters and can write them in capital and lower-case.  Chris has been teaching him how to sound out words, so he's just learning how to spell words on his own and recognize words.  He has a journal at preschool and when it was sent home for us parents to look at, we discovered he has a fascination with robots.  In the first sign of independence, he runs next door by himself to ask our neighbor to play and he's asking for playdates with friends from school.  He just might even have his first crush, an athletic little girl from his preschool class.  

Oliver is still a fun-loving kid with a big imagination.  He's obsessed with Legos and if it weren't for three little siblings taking his pieces, he could probably sit quietly for way longer than we ever give him credit for and build.  He loves playing outside, climbing, riding his bike, digging in the dirt or sand and creating make-believe games with his friends.  He also likes cuddling in my lap and having a book read to him.  He likes coming up with craft projects and keeps a bag of odds and ends (empty cardboard boxes, toilet paper rolls, plastic containers, etc.) in case a new idea comes to mind.  He made lots of signs to welcome us home from China and crafted a birthday crown for Kiera nearly all by himself.  He and I designed St. Patrick's Day cards with a little brainstorming help from Pinterest, but otherwise, the project was directed by Oliver. 

For all his sweetness, there's always going to be a developmentally-appropriate phase that will drive us bonkers and right now it's the "I want to go first" phase.  Oliver must, must, must be first to do everything.  First to get in the car, first to get out of the car (even though he sits in the back row), first to brush his teeth (even though he does not particularly like brushing his teeth) or first to get a goodnight hug and kiss.  He competes to be first in things I never imagined could be competitive.  Kiera and Matteo are so far oblivious to the competition, but Soren too easily takes the bait and before we know it, they're crying over who gets to go first. We need to remind Oliver daily that he cannot knock over or push one of his siblings out of the way in order to be first and that being first isn't always best. Right now that concept is lost on him. When we read bedtime stories, he sometimes skips the last book so he can be the first in bed, where he then declares that the first in bed gets the first hug and kiss. 

Kiera and Matteo's entry into our family didn't affect birth order, but Oliver's role as oldest child in the family simply grew bigger.  I am so proud of how well he has embraced the changes in our family.  He's done so well that when you observe him with Kiera and Matteo, it's easy to forget that he's only been their big brother for two months.  He loves them unconditionally and in return, they adore him. 

My (Healthy) Little Peanuts

With fall birthdays for my children, we get through the annual wellness visit, one of the semi-annual dentist visits and flu vaccinations in one fell swoop.  The kids started with dentist appointments, which went better than expected considering that both kids actually sat in the chair and more or less complied with instructions (Oliver more so than Soren).  When the hygienist told Oliver he must be doing a good job brushing because his teeth and gums looked so healthy, I couldn’t help but tell her that meant I was doing a good job brushing. She was quite happy to hear that I actually brush the kids’ teeth, which she instructs all parents to do.  Yes! Scored a “good mom” point there.  But then the dentist came in and announced that Oliver has a cavity.  I guess my brushing isn’t quite as stellar as I had thought.  

I’m often questioned why I bring my kids to the dentist when they’re so young.  Trying to convince people there’s a purpose in taking care of and treating teeth that are going to eventually fall out must be a constant battle dentists face.  Even I have questioned why, but it turns out Oliver's cavity is a good example of why it's important I keep bringing them in.  The cavity is in one of his molars, which he’s going to have until he’s 10 or 11 years old.  The dentist explained that cavities can spread slowly through the enamel, but once they penetrate the softer part of the tooth, the decay of the entire tooth can happen pretty quickly - in less than a year.  The thought of a tooth decaying in my otherwise healthy five-year-old's mouth was enough to book the appointment to have it filled without giving the decision much more thought.  

At their wellness check-ups, the boys came away with a glowing report of good health.  They're still tiny little guys, but healthy!  

Soren

• 28.8 pounds (17th percentile)
• 35.5 inches (10th percentile)

Oliver

• 37.4 pounds (22th percentile)
• 41 inches (13th percentile)  

When the doctor came in, he asked Oliver a ton of questions.  Thankfully Oliver had the right answers.  He insisted he loves broccoli and emphasized that he eats fruit at lunch every day.  (Okay the second part is at least true.)  He never mentioned the fruit snacks Dad lets him buy when they go grocery shopping together or the cookies he talks me into giving him.  Oliver loved showing off how high he could count and how he could balance on one foot.  He had all sorts of things to tell the doctor, which meant, unfortunately, that Soren never really got a chance to talk.  So that the doctor wouldn't think he was mute, I finally had to interrupt Oliver to tell him to let his brother answer first. 

Oliver at Five

I asked Oliver last night about how he felt about turning five.

"Awesome!" he said.

I asked why.  "Because it sounds exciting," he replied.  Oh, to be a five-year-old again.  Too cute.  I predict five will be an exciting year for Oliver. 

Oliver still likes building with blocks, but is moving on up to one of my favorite childhood toys, Legos.  Our neighbors' daughter recently got into Legos and Oliver has spent many summer afternoons and evenings playing on her porch with her.  Not surprisingly he asked for Legos for his birthday and Chris and I spent an evening (gleefully) looking over all the options on the internet. 

Oliver may finally be mature enough for Legos not just because he has developed the dexterity to manipulate such small pieces, but because his attention span is increasing.  If he's interested in something, he can actually stick with one task for a reasonable amount of time.  For instance, he'll sit at the dining room table and color for a whole half an hour.  And his pictures are becoming more recognizable and more detailed. 

His increased maturity and attention span is becoming useful.  For those who know Thomas the Train, he's becoming Really Useful.  My husband the engineer calls him a "value add."  Oliver may never like helping to pick up his toys, but gosh, he loves being a helper with everything else.  Chris put him to work helping to paint our master bedroom and not only did he love it, but he actually painted a lot of the wall and really well too.  Since Chris gets home from work earlier than I do, he usually starts dinner and Oliver loves to help.  Chris set out the ingredients for guacamole and coached Oliver through the steps, but otherwise, Oliver made it all by himself. 

Oliver can't talk quietly.  No matter how insignificant what he has to tell you is, it always seems like he's yelling.  I'm actually going to talk to the doctor to confirm he doesn't have a hearing problem.  Chris thinks I'm being ridiculous.  He thinks there's nothing wrong with him.  In his opinion, he simply gets his voice from his mom.

As loud as Oliver is when he talks, I'm proud of his seemingly large vocabulary and excellent grammar.  He speaks better English than most adults.  Except that he's picked up one "linguistic filler" overused by the younger generations  - the word "like".  While Oliver can chatter away, I have noticed that when he realizes he has your undivided attention while he tells a story, he suddenly has trouble getting the story out.  He pauses often to think of what he wants to say next and that's where I've recently noticed the word "like" used in ways that make me cringe.  And I cringed even more when I reflected on my own overuse of the word like and realized that as much as he's learning to use good/well and "you and I" versus "you and me" properly, I'm imparting some bad language habits as well. 

Oliver may be turning five and growing up in front of my eyes, but he still likes to sit in my lap to read a book.  I should be thankful that my lap is such a coveted spot and that Oliver and Soren beg to be the one who gets to sit there for the bedtime story.

We're still reading many of the picture books we've been reading for a few years now.  These are books with a couple of lines of text per page and a story line, but also tons of pictures.  We've tried getting him interested in chapter books, but for the most part, he's not interested.  Most of the time when we read books together, Soren is with us, and he quickly loses interest in stories without pictures and once he gets squirrely, Oliver follows suit.  We've had success with simple chapter books, like from the Penny series by Kevin Henkes, but again, these books focus on the pictures and that's still a big draw. 

Oliver can identify individual letters, but hasn't developed a recognition of words yet.  He "reads" books out loud from memorization.  And what a memory he has.  If I skip a word on the page when I'm reading, or inadvertently modify it, Oliver corrects me, and then will not let the issue drop until I acknowledge that I had read the word incorrectly. 

Before I talk about how much my kid loves the outdoors, I'll mention first that he also loves to sit on the couch in front of the TV.  He totally vegges out.  We used to have a lot of behavior problems after too much TV time, but now he's pretty good about accepting whatever limits we put on how much he can watch and will turn the TV or computer off when we ask him to.  And while I have a love-hate relationship with Oliver's love of TV, I admit it has its place.  It buys us some peace and quiet when we need to actually get something done around the house and for a kid who's otherwise so active and creative, why not let him indulge a little?

Because otherwise, Oliver is super active.  He loves being outside.  He likes fishing, tubing and riding on the boat.  He even likes collecting the black walnuts that fall in our yard from the neighbor's tree. His favorite days are when he gets to go to the beach and park and play outside with his neighbor buddy, Paloma, all in one day.  He's usually begging to go to "Shoots and Ladders," the beach at Lebanon Hills Regional Park or the Tamarack Nature Center.  He's finally figured out how to pump his legs on the swing, so lately, he wants to hit up the swings first before anything else at the playground.  The chillier fall weather isn't deterring him.  Even though the lake is now freezing cold, he'll still wade around in it until it's time to go home.  And then he checks to see if Paloma is outside and they play Legos or run around the front sidewalk and neighbors' yards playing the "hot lava game" (still haven't figured out what that is!) and whatever else their imaginations come up with. 

If he isn't playing pretend with Paloma, he's making up stories. Oliver's latest thing at bedtime is to tell make-believe stories.  He wants everyone to tell a story, even Soren, who obliges. 

Oliver's 5th birthday is shaping up to be a good one.  On the docket for the day is spending time with one of his favorite babysitters and Grandma (they're tag-teaming filling in while our au pair is out of town), handing out homemade cookies to his classmates at preschool and then going to ECFE where he'll get to wear a birthday crown.  Again, wouldn't it be great to be five again?

Roommates

Oliver and Soren are officially roommates.  I hope they like sharing a room because they're pretty much stuck in the same jail cell-size bedroom for the next decade!

We've been talking about moving Soren into Oliver's room ever since we started the adoption process so we could turn Soren's room into the new sibling's bedroom.  We bought a bunk bed ahead of the transition, but never actually followed through and Oliver ended up sleeping on the bottom bunk while the promises/threats of Soren moving in never materialized.  It was too easy to keep them in separate rooms where we didn't have to worry about one waking up the other or trying to coordinate bedtimes.  The few times the boys had begged for a "sleepover," no sleeping actually happened and we sent Soren back to his room for the rest of the night.  We were finally in a good place with the kids and sleep and we were hesitant to mess up our progress.  

The looming start to our house renovation finally pushed us to make the transition to the boys sharing a room.  The contractors are going to end up punching a hole through the wall of Soren's room, so he (and all his stuff) needed to be out of there.  Chris took the kids up to the cabin one weekend and my mother-in-law, brother-in-law and sister-in-law helped me move furniture, box up outgrown clothes, toys and books a future child will hopefully use some day, and find space for Soren's things in what is already a tiny bedroom.

While I was sentimental about Soren leaving his "baby room," he thankfully didn't seem to miss it.  On their first night home from the cabin, he seemed perfectly happy with his new digs.  We went about our usual bedtime routine read them books on the floor of their new shared room, then tucked Oliver into his top bunk and Soren into the bottom bunk and turned out the lights.  The room was silent.

If only it had been as easy as that!  Not long after lights out, I heard the pitter-patter of feet.  Two-plus hours and about 37 trips upstairs later, both kids were finally asleep.  The next night it only took a little over an hour for them to fall asleep and bedtime has generally gotten better with each night.  

Oliver Update: 4.5 Years

A friend with a five-year-old told me that she witnessed a huge change between four and five.  They grow so much intellectually at this age and I can see that in Oliver.  Sure, he hasn't left the "Why?" stage, but he can also ask really thought questions.  If he hears a word in conversation or in a book he doesn't understand, he asks me what it means.  And when I took him to hear a talk about how maple syrup is produced, I thought for sure he wasn't going to be able to follow it.  Not only was he really engaged, but he shot up his little hand from the back row to ask questions!  And this from a kid I've always considered kind of shy and not liking to be put on the spot.  Afterward, he couldn't wait to grab a bucket and walk out to the sugar bush to collect sap.  

For as Oliver's awe-inspiring maturation, there's one habit I had hoped he'd grown out of by this point and that is whining.  This kid has stamina when it comes to whining.  If we don't address the behavior, I wonder to myself if it's possible that he would just whine forever.  Instead, we work on using a pleasant tone of voice and setting boundaries.  We don't give in to whining (or try not to, but there are for sure times when he wears us down) and give him a choice about, for instance, sitting quietly at the dinner table, or whining in his bedroom. 

Yes, we still deal with a lot of whining (and crying) at meal times.  Oliver still has a lot of food issues and rarely likes anything we serve for dinner. At one point he announced that there were five acceptable dinner foods.  He rattled off noodles, pancakes, waffles and tortellini and then faltered as if his list was complete, but then changed his mind and added, "Oh, and sandwiches."

Despite the food battles we have at home, he does fine at daycare where he has zero choice over the breakfast, lunch and afternoon snack he's served.  The kids eat family-style, so maybe good old peer pressure plays a positive roll in that.  However, part of our routine when I drop him off at daycare is that I have to read the day's menu for him.  He always wants to know what he's having, which makes me wonder if dinner drama could be averted with a meal plan.  If I can get myself organized enough to plan meals for the week and have Oliver help me brainstorm, perhaps he'll be more open to what's being served.

Even though it seems like Oliver lives off of noodles, snacks, breakfast foods and sandwiches, he still manages to grow.  At 34 pounds, he can barely keep his size 4T pants on his waist, but the 3T became too short, so he officially moved on to the next size.  He still wears 4T shirts, but once spring is here, I think he'll be able to wear 5T tops.  At 41 inches tall, he's still a peanut for his age.  He'll always seem big to me because I will always be able to remember him at a younger age, and he seems so big in comparison, but when he stands next to his friends, it's apparent how much shorter he is than the rest of the kids his age.  I'm not worried about him being able to hold his own though.  If he gets even a bit of his father's athletic ability, he'll be able to outrun and outplay everyone.

It took many weeks for Oliver to get in the groove of the routine at his new daycare, but even on the days with tears, I think there was overall a lot he liked about daycare.  All the kids in his class are really nice and he has two teachers he is fond of.  Being downtown, the class walks to story time at the library, visits the Children's Museum and attends various events, like the Winter Carnival.  Oliver rode a school bus for the first time (a highlight for him!) when his class attended the Voices for Children Advocacy Day at the Capitol. 

Since Oliver goes to daycare full-time, his daycare serves as his preschool.  He's learning the foundation for reading, writing and math and science, music and art are part their week too.  With all the talk of kindergarten readiness, I have confidence Oliver will be plenty ready to start full-day kindergarten.  Because of his fall birthday, he'll go to school a year after his friends with summer birthdays and that extra year surely won't hurt. 

Oliver has grasped onto the idea of "theme" nights.  He likes having "movie night" and "pancake night" and any other theme night he can think up.  Sometimes it's just a regular old night with dinner, clean-up, a little playtime, and then bedtime, but he wants to know what kind of "night" we're going to have.  For some reason, "bath night" isn't an acceptable answer. 

Oliver and Soren act like you expect of siblings and there are times when the bickering, taunting, goading and tattle-taleing makes me want to scream.  And then there was the morning Oliver read Soren a book while I finished getting ready for work.  They climbed onto Soren's bed where Oliver "read" him a book he had memorized.  I don't think Soren had a clue that Oliver was reading the book from memory.  He had someone reading him a book and he was thrilled. 

"Reading" to Himself

Early yesterday morning we heard Oliver's voice right outside our bedroom door.  With morning grogginess, it took me a moment to figure out what he was talking about.  Then I recognized that he was "reading" himself books that I hadn't realized he had memorized.  The days of Oliver yelling to us from his bed that he was awake seemed so long ago.  I guess my conversations with him about respecting others who are still sleeping and the need for him to entertain himself (quietly) in the morning might have fine sunk in. 

I noticed Chris was awake and whispered, asking him if he noticed Oliver was reading to himself.  We lay there quietly and listened to the innocent sound of Oliver's four-year-old voice as he read himself Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See and Wet Dog.  It was such a treat to listen to the sound of Oliver's voice when he thought no one else was listening.  I was amazed at how well he knew most of the words.  Of course I know most of those books by heart now too, and so I laughed when he clearly paraphrased a longer section.  It was fun to hear his take on the story.  Then he picked up a picture book and started with, "This is a front-end loader. And on this page, these are firetrucks and so on."  He talked out loud to himself for a little while longer while he pointed out pictures.  I wondered how long he would keep reading, but when Soren stirred, we knew it was time to get out of bed.  Oliver heard us rustle, dropped his book and popped into our room.  Our impromptu story hour was over.  

Wellness Visit Updates

Oliver and Soren really love me right now.  They had back-to-back doctor's and dentist's appointments.  But they survived and came home with clean bills of health. 

Oliver was a lot more comfortable at the dentist than last year.  He cried about having to sit in the special chair, but settled down, let the hygienist take x-rays and then didn't freak out when I left the room to take Soren to have his teeth cleaned.  When I came back in to check on Oliver, he was following the hygienist's instructions - and gripping the arms of the chair with dear life.  He cried again when the dentist came in to inspect his teeth and apply fluoride, but his mood took a 180 when he was finally allowed to climb down from the chair.  With tears still staining his cheeks, he happily proclaimed, "It's Soren's turn!"

I reconfirmed that Soren does NOT like having his teeth cleaned.  I'll just leave it at that.  He has 15 teeth now and the only fun fact that came out of his visit is that he'll probably only end up with 19 of 20 baby teeth.  He's missing a lateral incisor and those usually erupt before age two and they're one of those most common baby teeth a kid could be missing, so the dentist's hunch for now is that he won't get one. 

The next morning the kids visited the doctor for the respective four-year and two-year wellness visits.  They were happy as could be in the waiting room, but as soon as the nurse called their names, Soren started to cry and that prompted Oliver to be clingy and anxious.  We hadn't even made it to the exam room and, let's just say, my kids had already announced their presence!  The nurses just chuckle when they see us coming.

Oliver is in the 25th percentile for both height and weight, at 39 inches tall and 32 pounds, 8 ounces. 

Soren is supposedly in the 25th percentile for height at 33 3/4 inches, but I was confident in the nurse's quick measurement on a kid who wasn't lying still, so I think he's more like 33 inches.  At 24 pounds and 2 ounces, he's in the 5th percentile for weight. 

I asked the doctor about Soren's monthly fevers.  He was in again last week and the doctor he saw it's normal for kids over the age of six months to catch a virus on average once a month.  I followed up with Soren's pediatrician at his wellness visit, because while I understand young kids can seem like they're constantly sick, like they have a running nose or unsettling cough that seems to last all winter, Soren's illnesses come at regular intervals of three to four weeks.  He has a high fever for about three days, with few other symptoms, and then it's gone.  The doctor says for kids experiencing what I described, there might be something more serious going on than just catching another virus.  But he ruled out anything too concerning given that Soren is following his growth curves perfectly and he rebounds quickly and well from each episode.  So instead of putting him through extensive test for something he'll probably grow out of, his doctor and I decided we'd take a wait-and-see approach. 

Happy Birthday Oliver!

My labor with Oliver was long and tiring.  On this day four years ago , I was so exhausted and not even the euphoria of having given birth to a child was enough to counteract my desperation for a good night's sleep.  Fast forward four years and Oliver allowed me to sleep in!   I was surprised and thankful when I woke up this morning and saw the clock read 7:30 a.m. and heard not a rustle of activity from either Oliver or Soren's rooms.  It was almost 8:30 a.m. by the time I got out of bed.  Such a "late" morning is unheard of in my world anymore. 

Since Oliver's birthday falls on a Sunday this year, he ended up with a weekend full of fun birthday activities.  In lieu of a birthday party, he invited one of his best buddies, Archer, to spend yesterday afternoon at Como Town, a little amusement park adjacent to the city zoo.  We had visited the zoo earlier this summer and he spotted the "playground," which he was more interested in than the animals.  He was so upset he wasn't allowed to go in, but yesterday he finally got his chance.  He and Archer "raced" cars around a track (top speed was probably 1 mph!), rode a train and laughed themselves dizzy on the spinning teacups.  Jenn and I enjoyed catching up while the kids rode the rides and then the four of us went out to dinner afterward. 

The weather was glorious today - cloudless skies and unseasonably warm - the perfect day to celebrate a four-year-old's birthday with a bouncy castle and a Twins game.  I can thank my neighbors for the bouncy castle. I was out for a walk with Soren when I saw that they still had the bouncy castle up they had rented the day before for a party.  The family was in the yard playing, so we stopped in to say hello.  Chris was at home getting Oliver ready to head out to the last Twins game of the season, so I texted him to come over.  Oliver and Soren loved bouncing around in the castle and going down the huge slide.  I even climbed in there and bounced with them.  Then Chris announced it was time to leave and Oliver wanted to stay so badly that I literally had to drag him out of that thing. 

The trip to the Twins game ultimately beat the experience of the bouncy castle.  Oliver got to ride a train to the game, eat every possible not-good-for-your-health food the stadium has to offer and then run the bases after the game.  He even got to make a sandcastle in the infield.  It was quite the birthday for a four-year-old. 

On the Cusp of Turning Four

About a year and a half ago Oliver received his first real tricycle.  It was a retro-looking Radio Flyer.  Even after Chris had lowered the seat as far down as it would go, Oliver barely, just barely, fit on it.  His feet didn't comfortably reach the pedals, but he didn't have any interest in using them anyway.  Instead, he'd lean into the handle bars and would rapidly propel forward by pushing off from the sidewalk with his feet.  His technique provided speed, but also many bruises from the pedals smacking against his shins!

This summer Oliver learned how to use the pedals.  He had finally started to cruise around on his trike like a big boy, and then I realized that he looked, well, like a really big boy.  The seat was suddenly too low for him and Chris kept raising the seat until it couldn't go any higher.  A week later I watched Oliver pedal down the sidewalk and realized that even with the seat adjusted to its maximum height, he was too big for his tricycle. 

On the cusp of turning four, Oliver is growing up.  In a blink of an eye I know he'll be on the cusp of fourteen.  But right now he's only four.  He misses Mom and Dad while he's at preschool, sleeps with his teddy bear and lets me hold his hand.   

As sweet and sensitive as Oliver is, he's got a wit about him.  In a very serious and matter-of-fact tone of voice, Oliver told me, "We have to have a talk."  The way he said it made me very nervous. What was his little soul going to confess?  Or did he have a question I was going to be unable to answer? However, without missing a beat, he told me I make mac and cheese too hot for him.  Apparently he was still miffed that I hadn't properly cooled down the previous night's dinner the way he likes it.

We continue to have food struggles with Oliver, particularly dinner.  He'd prefer to eat a sandwich or mac and cheese every night for dinner if you'd allow him.  The majority of dinners seem to be punctuated with (loud) declarations from Oliver that he doesn't like what's being served or that he's not going to eat any of it.  He's also really curious about learning new words, so when I told him what the word "allergic" meant, he grew happy and excitedly told me he was allergic to soup, which, coincidentally, was what we were eating for dinner that night. 

Like most four-year-olds, Oliver is chatty and curious.  He always wants to know, "Why?"  His vocabulary continues to increase and he uses better grammar than most people I encounter in the professional world.  People mention how well-spoken he is.  The only downside to Oliver's talkativeness is that when he speaks, though, he projects at only two decibel levels - high and higher. 

We are still stressing the please and thank you, but have now also taught him that tone of voice also matters, not just saying please.  We're teaching him to say excuse me before interrupting a conversation. 

Oliver still likes playing with blocks and trains.  He likes digging in the dirt and burying things in the sand at the playground or beach.  He's particularly into arts and crafts right now.  We have an art cupboard in our dining room and half the contents end up strewn around the dining room table - construction paper, paint sets, bottles of glue, pipe cleaners and puff balls.

Amidst the arts and crafts supplies, Oliver developed an obsession with tape, which only wanes when we stop restocking.  He'd wrap up blocks or random pieces of paper around the house.  Before I could throw away a large ball of newspaper wrapped in masking tape, I had to rip it apart to make sure there was nothing but paper inside of it. 

Oliver can almost write his name...except for forgetting the "v" and putting all the vowels in a row.  But at least he has an interest in writing letters, so he'll get here. He likes to ask us how to spell a word and then prints each letter as we say them.  Spelling is one of the many instances where I'm amazed at Oliver's natural interest in learning.  We never specifically taught him his colors, numbers or letter, but he's either learned seemingly on his own, or asks us to teach him. 

Oliver learned how to rock climb this year with his dad and is more comfortable with swimming.  He's come so far in the last two years when he screamed through his entire swim lessons!  He's taking part in other activities that equally appeal to adults, like fishing and going out on the boat.  Chris is finally realizing the dream he's carried with him since before Oliver was born and that is to share his favorite pastimes with his kids.  Oliver has finally reached the age where he can be more a participant and less and observer. 

Since Oliver had outgrown his tricycle, we found him a bike with training wheels on Craig's List.  It came with a bell and a water bottle holder.  For a kid who had been unsure what to make of his tricycle when he first got it, Oliver hopped on his new bike without hesitation.  He zips up and down the sidewalk and races the neighbor girl.  The training wheels don't slow him down for now, but someday too soon, he'll no longer need them. 

Oliver Update: 3 Years

This past year has been wild with a new baby and new job that I had nearly failed to realize the verbal, cognitive, and fine and gross motor skills Oliver has developed since he turned two.  Other than talking, it's not that he's developed many new skills, it's just that over the past twelve months, he does everything better.  As for the new skills though, at age three, he's able to climb (really high) ladders at the playground, jump, operate an iPad better than Mom, tell stories and take his own shoes on and off.  I take for granted that he can say, "I love you, Mom."  It feels like he's been saying those heart-melting words his whole life, but in fact, he barely said any two-word phrases and his vocabulary was quite limited by his second birthday. 

Three is an age of juxtapositions.  There are the nights when I wrestle with Oliver to change him into his pajamas and brush his teeth and others when I cuddle with him in his bed and we chat about three-year-old stuff and I'm in awe of the life Chris and I created.  Going into any situation - playing, sitting down for dinner, going outside, picking out clothes for the day - I never know whether I'm going to encounter calm or hysterics.  I'm often on edge waiting for what I assume is going to be an inevitable power struggle. 

Oliver has been simultaneously adjusting to a number of transitions this past month and the adjustment has upped the ante on his behavior.  In the span of two days, he started preschool, started with a new nanny, went back to ECFE and started potty training in earnest.  In addition, Chris is back in school, which means Oliver goes from Tuesday bedtime until Friday afternoon without seeing his dad.  The result is that Oliver vacillates between not being cooperative about simple tasks, like getting dressed, being clingy when I'm trying to get ready for work because he doesn't want me to go, to pushing his brother over to get attention or just stage an all-out tantrum.  His ECFE teacher assured me these behaviors are normal for this age and that it can take weeks to adjust to so many transitions.  At her suggestion, we're putting together a timeline with pictures that cue Oliver to what the schedule is for that day and we hope that helps him feel more comfortable knowing what's coming next. 

A year later, Oliver still likes his trains, but can now play with them mostly independently.  We moved them to the basement to give him something to play with while he hangs out with Dad when football games are on.  He was never into blocks until a couple of months ago, but now plays with them daily.  Of course he still loves trucks of any kind and impresses friends and family by his ability to identify various construction vehicles.  He enjoys watching the most mundane videos of garbage trucks and fire engines on YouTube, which the nanny discovered is the key to successfully watching two kids and preparing lunch prep.  And like most kids, he's obsessed with his dad's iPad, which he likes to play games on and watch the occasional Bob the Builder video. 

He still likes coloring with markers, painting and drawing with chalk.  He's been less into bubbles lately, but that may be because we've kept them out of reach recently, so out of sight, out of mind.  He loves being outdoors and likes riding his tricycle up and down the sidewalk in front of our house.  He hasn't quite figured out the peddles - he pushes himself along with his feet and when he's built up momentum, only then doe he put his feet on the peddles. 

We've asked Oliver a couple of time over the past few weeks what he wants for his birthday and all he was books.  Of course he still likes to be read to, but he'll look at books on his own and occasionally I'll overhear him "read" random parts of a book that he knows from memory.  Although he still enjoys many of the books he's been reading since he was a baby, he's grown out of the baby board books and to my relief has advanced to books with a story line.  I imagine that many of the books we read to him now he'll still be enjoying as he heads into elementary school. 

What I don't know is how long he'll want me to curl up with him in bed to read him a bedtime story.  No matter how stressful of a parenting day I've had, on those nights when Oliver and I lie in bed and talk, they're just magically sweet and I'm reminded that my "big boy" is actually just three.  He's sometimes frightened, sometimes sad.  He has an amazing vocabulary and has reached the point where he can express feelings, but he can't say why he feels that way.  He's still so innocent and his mom and dad are still the center of his world.

I'm usually exhausted by the time we reach Oliver's bedtime and I find lying with him and talking about his day relaxing.  Before I get up so I can let him sleep, I smother him in hugs and kisses until he's giggling and then he smiles innocently at me when I say how lucky I am that I have him for a son and how proud I am to be his mom. 

Oliver Update: 2 and a Half Years

At two and a half, Oliver can still be challenging - he's still a toddler - but he generally seems happier.  He's not teething, at least not for the time-being (four molars to go yet) and he's adjusted to having a little brother and being home with a nanny during the week.  If anything is distressing to him, it is that he doesn't understand weekdays and weekends and it must seem random to him that one day he wakes up and mommy and daddy go to work and Ashley comes and then he suddenly doesn't get to see Ashley and vice versa. 

Oliver loves his little brother, Soren.  Yup, I'm purposefully getting that in writing just in case he someday takes after his first-born parents and complains that his little brother is annoying, dorky, an embarrassment, or any combination thereof.  But at this innocent stage in his life, he likes to give Soren hugs and kisses and is respectful of his limitations as a playmate.  Okay, sometimes he snatches toys from Soren's chubby little hands and yells, "That's mine!" (even when it's not) but most of the time he'll bring Soren toys to play with.  Oliver is very attentive of Soren's needs and points out, just in case I hadn't myself noticed, that Soren has woken up, is crying, has spit up, needs his pacifier or is doing tummy time.  The funniest is when he projects his own feelings on Soren tells me what his non-verbal brother is thinking, such as that he misses Daddy or wants to play outside. 

Telling me what Soren is up to is just one part of Oliver's general routine of narrating everything he's doing or what's going on around him.  He chatters up a storm!  To put it in perspective, Chris says Oliver talks as much as his mom.  But don't all toddlers talk incessantly?

The only reason he doesn't talk more is that we think he can't yet talk as fast as he can think.  His pronunciation can still make it difficult sometimes for those who don't spend much time around him to understand him.  There have been times when I've looked at the nanny hoping that she had a translation. 

But you can hear those wheels of language development turning.  He's figured out verb conjugations, but hasn't quite gotten a hang of all of the exceptions to the rules, like saying, "The bird flied away." instead of "The bird flew away."  And he's trying to use logic to figure out new words. He and Chris went over to the park and watched some kids playing hockey.  When Chris asked Oliver what they were doing, he replied, "They're hockeying."  Or he'll say, "That dog is 'woofing' at me."

Oliver surprises us every day with the words he knows.  Some of them we just wonder where he learned, like when he announced to us that he wanted to go to a car wash.  We finally asked the nanny and sure enough, she had gotten her car washed the week before.  Or he'll pick up random phrases from books, but if we don't make the connection to the story, it's impossible to figure out what he's talking about.  His latest phrase is, "I need sumpin." (Translation, "I need something.")  We'd ask him repeatedly what he needed and offered up suggestions.  Then Chris was reading him an often-requested book about a boy getting a new baby brother and when he got to the part about the mom explaining that babies cry when they need something and then she rocked the baby and he settled down, it dawned on us that maybe that was Oliver's way of saying that he need to be hugged or cuddled too. 

Oliver is developing socially too.  We can tell there's a core group of people he always thinking about: his family, the little girl who lives next door, Ashley and her husband Matt, his friends Elsa and Noelle, and Noelle's mom, Dawn.  It used to be that he wanted to play with the girl next door because he just wanted to play with her toys, but he's matured to enjoying her companionship when they're running around outside together. 

While Oliver has a small group of family and friends he feels comfortable around, he's still socially cautious.  I've written before how he's not likely to immediately climb onto a play structure at the park if there are tons of kids on it.  He tends to hang back at first, as if he's figuring out how to read the scene and where he fits in with the group. 

Assessments were conducted on all the kids in Oliver's ECFE class and when the teacher noted that he didn't really play beside others or with others, but rather watched other children and played by himself, my first reaction was to need reassurance that these weren't signs that he's going to be a loner.  Not the slightest, she said.  He was happy and laughed a lot during the class and enjoys being around other children.

And I see this when he's with that group of kids and their parents he feels comfortable with.  It was adorable to watch him play with his friend Flora at the park.  They happily and quietly played in the sand and conducted their own conversation without any meddling from us parents.  Then the playground bully stole Flora's bucket and dumped sand on her head.  While Flora and the other girl tussled over the bucket, Oliver quietly picked up his bucket and shovel and moved away from the bully's orbit and continued to play.  So, yes, he's social in his own way, but clearly not confrontational. 



Oliver continues to have a variety of interests.  He still loves play dough, painting, drawing, watching YouTube videos of any sort of vehicles or music videos of such classics as "The Wheels on the Bus," books, riding his tricycle, playing in the sand with his buckets and shovels, playing in his rice box, kicking and throwing balls, and playing with his "choo choos," cars, trucks and puzzles.   

He still loves to draw, but his scribbles are actually starting to look like identifiable objects.  Not surprisingly, he likes to draw cars.  And even though he has tons of books, he seems to have them all memorized. You can stop reading a book and he can tell you the rest of the plot line.

Since we're going back to Philadelphia to see family for Easter, we sent Oliver in for a haircut.  Three's a charm, because other than some tears when he realized we were going to make him sit in that really high up chair, he sat mostly still and quietly for a haircut.  And each time he emerges from the hairdresser, he looks more and more grown up.  My little boy is getting older before my eyes.