Oliver Update: 4.5 Years

A friend with a five-year-old told me that she witnessed a huge change between four and five.  They grow so much intellectually at this age and I can see that in Oliver.  Sure, he hasn't left the "Why?" stage, but he can also ask really thought questions.  If he hears a word in conversation or in a book he doesn't understand, he asks me what it means.  And when I took him to hear a talk about how maple syrup is produced, I thought for sure he wasn't going to be able to follow it.  Not only was he really engaged, but he shot up his little hand from the back row to ask questions!  And this from a kid I've always considered kind of shy and not liking to be put on the spot.  Afterward, he couldn't wait to grab a bucket and walk out to the sugar bush to collect sap.  

For as Oliver's awe-inspiring maturation, there's one habit I had hoped he'd grown out of by this point and that is whining.  This kid has stamina when it comes to whining.  If we don't address the behavior, I wonder to myself if it's possible that he would just whine forever.  Instead, we work on using a pleasant tone of voice and setting boundaries.  We don't give in to whining (or try not to, but there are for sure times when he wears us down) and give him a choice about, for instance, sitting quietly at the dinner table, or whining in his bedroom. 

Yes, we still deal with a lot of whining (and crying) at meal times.  Oliver still has a lot of food issues and rarely likes anything we serve for dinner. At one point he announced that there were five acceptable dinner foods.  He rattled off noodles, pancakes, waffles and tortellini and then faltered as if his list was complete, but then changed his mind and added, "Oh, and sandwiches."

Despite the food battles we have at home, he does fine at daycare where he has zero choice over the breakfast, lunch and afternoon snack he's served.  The kids eat family-style, so maybe good old peer pressure plays a positive roll in that.  However, part of our routine when I drop him off at daycare is that I have to read the day's menu for him.  He always wants to know what he's having, which makes me wonder if dinner drama could be averted with a meal plan.  If I can get myself organized enough to plan meals for the week and have Oliver help me brainstorm, perhaps he'll be more open to what's being served.

Even though it seems like Oliver lives off of noodles, snacks, breakfast foods and sandwiches, he still manages to grow.  At 34 pounds, he can barely keep his size 4T pants on his waist, but the 3T became too short, so he officially moved on to the next size.  He still wears 4T shirts, but once spring is here, I think he'll be able to wear 5T tops.  At 41 inches tall, he's still a peanut for his age.  He'll always seem big to me because I will always be able to remember him at a younger age, and he seems so big in comparison, but when he stands next to his friends, it's apparent how much shorter he is than the rest of the kids his age.  I'm not worried about him being able to hold his own though.  If he gets even a bit of his father's athletic ability, he'll be able to outrun and outplay everyone.

It took many weeks for Oliver to get in the groove of the routine at his new daycare, but even on the days with tears, I think there was overall a lot he liked about daycare.  All the kids in his class are really nice and he has two teachers he is fond of.  Being downtown, the class walks to story time at the library, visits the Children's Museum and attends various events, like the Winter Carnival.  Oliver rode a school bus for the first time (a highlight for him!) when his class attended the Voices for Children Advocacy Day at the Capitol. 

Since Oliver goes to daycare full-time, his daycare serves as his preschool.  He's learning the foundation for reading, writing and math and science, music and art are part their week too.  With all the talk of kindergarten readiness, I have confidence Oliver will be plenty ready to start full-day kindergarten.  Because of his fall birthday, he'll go to school a year after his friends with summer birthdays and that extra year surely won't hurt. 

Oliver has grasped onto the idea of "theme" nights.  He likes having "movie night" and "pancake night" and any other theme night he can think up.  Sometimes it's just a regular old night with dinner, clean-up, a little playtime, and then bedtime, but he wants to know what kind of "night" we're going to have.  For some reason, "bath night" isn't an acceptable answer. 

Oliver and Soren act like you expect of siblings and there are times when the bickering, taunting, goading and tattle-taleing makes me want to scream.  And then there was the morning Oliver read Soren a book while I finished getting ready for work.  They climbed onto Soren's bed where Oliver "read" him a book he had memorized.  I don't think Soren had a clue that Oliver was reading the book from memory.  He had someone reading him a book and he was thrilled.