According to an advocate who's heavily involved in China hosting program,
"This little boy has a big label in his file, a file that was created when he first came into the orphanage at two years old. That label is autism. But, looking back at his history, the orphanage and our agency think that this diagnosis is potentially INACCURATE. He was shut down when he came. He is now active, lively, and has normal behavior according to the orphanage director. But that autism label can not be changed in his file. It will forever follow him."I know how labels or inaccurate diagnoses can hurt a child's chance of being adopted. My daughter was misdiagnosed with cerebral palsy, which is crazy, because anyone who meets her can clearly tell she does NOT have CP. But that was the label her file contained, and even though she was a young, otherwise healthy girl - the epitome of the child so many families adopting from China seek to be matched with - families passed her over.
I know the odds are stacked even more heavily against Ian. He's a boy. He's already four. And he's labeled as autistic. Adoption takes a huge leap of faith, and even more so when children have special needs, as all the children do who are eligible for international adoption from China. If the autism diagnosis is incorrect, it needlessly scares families away. And even if it's correct, the needs of children with autism varies so much that such a label alone does little to prepare families.
This is why Ian's host family has set up evaluations with specialists who will help identify his medical needs. But just as important, Ian's host family and other advocates will have the opportunity to get to know this little boy in a way that an adoption file of just a couple pages will never be able to convey. With our knowledge of who Ian is as a child, and not a label, we can advocate for him and encourage you to advocate for him as well.
Mike and I would jump at the chance to adopt this sweet child and give him a forever home. Sadly, my husband's mild and well controlled bipolar diagnosis and my too high BMI mean we are not even eligible to try to adopt from China. Labels on the kids aren't the only labels doing them a disservice. This alternately makes me angry and heartbroken.
ReplyDeleteJenn, the good news is that parents with mild mental health histories are able to adopt from China. As for the BMI requirement, Ian is labeled "Special Focus," which means a family can request a waiver of any requirement (except for age - Chinese law says you have to be 30). Great Wall China Adoption, the agency Ian is being hosted through, is very accommodating of parents with mental health histories and/or those who need to request a waiver.
ReplyDeleteJenn, I forgot to add that if you've already looked into adopting from China and were told you weren't eligible by an agency, move on to another agency. We were also told we were not eligible to adopt from China and I assumed the reasons were due to Chinese law. It turns out, the reasons were due to that particular agency's own rules and conservatism/bias. I'm so happy I contacted another agency and joined China adoption Facebook groups where I learned that not all adoption agencies operate equally.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Kirsten. We've had quite the heartbreaking journey looking into all manner of adoptions, and this is the first that I have heard there is any possibility of waiving a requirement. We'll be following your recommendation and seeking out some different resources. Thank you!!!
ReplyDeleteJenn, if you are at all interested in reconsidering adopting from China, please contact me and I'll be happy to discuss specifics with you and/or suggest some agencies that would be good to start with. Although adoption is so unpredictable and situations can change in a heartbeat, China is a relatively stable program, and many families start the process and are home with their children in under a year.
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