The Long Road to Diaper-Free

Oliver is now completely diaper-free, even at night. Despite my excitement, it's been a long road.  I wasn't always sure I was making the right decisions, but we eventually got there.

Our last hurdle was to get Oliver to use the toilet since not only had he created for himself a big case of constipation, but Chris and I were also frustrated with changing him in to a diaper before putting him to bed for the night, only to have to change his soiled diaper after he'd done his "business" just minutes after we'd kissed him goodnight.  So I did the opposite of what I assumed every doctor or parenting book on toilet-training would recommend and bought a bottle of Miralax and juice boxes of apple juice, fed him as many canned peaches for dinner as he wanted and hoped I was successful in jump-starting his system well before bedtime so he physically couldn't wait for a diaper anymore.  It worked.  Oliver has been in underwear every night since.

But establishing a consistent (and stress-free) potty routines continues to be a challenge.  Oliver still often fights puts off having to use the potty.  I think that's typical for kids this age who don't want to stop the fun they're having to use the toilet or are afraid they won't get to go back to what they're doing.  I once had to repeatedly assure Oliver his plate of waffles would still be there after he used the potty before he decided to leave the table on his own free will.  And I've been guilty of not letting him off the potty until he'd relieved himself in instances when I either knew he had to go badly or knew he wasn't going to have the opportunity to use a toilet later on. 

I felt guilty about pushing Oliver, because the consensus in parenting circles today is that you should have a cheerful "oh, don't worry, accidents happen" attitude and let your child guide the process.  I actually don't say that completely cynically.  I did try to be as relaxed as possible when we were in the toilet awareness stage and I never punished Oliver for an accident.  But when we reached the point that Oliver knew how to use the toilet and I believed he understood the cues his body was giving him, I felt it was best to be firm about what was expected of him.  The rationale behind the tactic of giving him an extra dose of fiber was that a constipated kid isn't going to have opportunities to practice using the potty, something Oliver had grown anxious about, (admittedly, potentially because of the pressure he was feeling to perform) and I wanted him to have a chance to experience a success. 

It's true Oliver would eventually left diapers behind on his own, but I think in our circumstance, we avoided prolonged frustration by stocking up on extra laundry detergent and stopping with diapers all together.