Dinner a work in progress

The only thing that's changed about dinner time at my house since Oliver was born has been standards.  My goal is still harmonious, relaxing family dinners with well-balanced, homemade meals.  In the meantime, I'm expecting that dinner time will be chaotic at least through the toddler years and achieving the vision I'd always had of family dinners is simply a work in progress. 

If I get home from work on time, I have about 30 minutes to feed the baby, set the table and prepare dinner before Oliver hits meltdown mode.  And by prepare dinner, I mean, microwave leftovers or whatever meal exchange meal I'd (hopefully) remembered to transfer from the freezer to the fridge to thaw that morning.  Chris and I learned on the evening of my first day back at work that actual cooking on a work night just isn't feasible.  Chris, meanwhile, entertains the kids, and somehow we manage to pull ourselves together for a family dinner.  Oliver may be throwing a fit about what's for dinner, while Soren suddenly needs to nurse and Chris or I or both of us shuttle back and forth between the dining room and the kitchen for a forgotten utensil or a refill of Oliver's water, but we do eventually make it to the table and sit down to eat together.

And this beautiful family harmony, the quintessential image I carry in my mind of what families do together, lasts, oh, about ten minutes.  And whining and crying often make up a good portion of that precious time.  Sometimes we go against better parenting practices and acquiesce to Oliver's request (demand) for a "wahwipop," but it buys us not just extra time at the dinner table, but Oliver's good mood. 

I'm realizing it takes time and a lot of modeling before children are old enough to master social mores, manners and all that.  Like I said, it's a work in progress.