The past couple of days have been especially challenging. Oliver has been crying a lot. I don't have to say anymore in order for another parent to understand how I might be slowly be driven to insanity by the incessant whining and throw-myself-on-the-ground-and-cry-crocodile-tears type of behavior out of my otherwise adorable little boy. Despite Oliver's history with ear infections, I'm going to assume the cause of his general consternation is not that, but the two teeth that have been taking their good old time breaking through his top gum line.
Chris and I experienced an especially bad day on Sunday, a day we thought we'd savor because it was the only day out of the week Chris would actually see Oliver since his travel and school schedule had him away from home the other six days. Instead, we instituted three "chill out" times in Oliver's crib before he even went down for his official nap right after lunch. With Chris back in Dallas on Monday morning, I've been on my own again. I thought distraction would help Oliver's crabbiness, so yesterday it was the Children's Museum and today we went to story time at a local bookshop. While those outings were not complete failures, I'm hoping tomorrow's tot time at the gym of a nearby rec center elicits a few more smiles.
The days-long stretches of unabated neediness are challenging, but thankfully I'm not alone. Last week when I showed up for the January meal exchange, made up of women from my hospital group whose kids' birthdays are all within months of each other, the kids having "bad" weeks were in the majority. One mom and her husband were in such need of a break that they argued about who got to go deliver the food to the meal exchange and who had to stay home with the baby. (She cooked, so she got the free hour away.)
Eventually nighttime comes and if Oliver seems tired enough, I can put him to bed early. I have a few hours to decompress before my own bedtime. And as I drift off to sleep, I remind myself, tomorrow is another day, and wish for the best.
Kiera, Matteo, Oliver and Soren
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You're definitely not alone, hang in there! Jace was up all night last night with molars, he hasn't done that in months. Teething can be really hard on them on certain days, but it's hard not to get frustrated because it's so hard to communicate with someone who doesn't yet understand why they're crying.
ReplyDeleteI know how extremely hard it can be to listen to a crying baby all day, I thought I was going to lose my mind OFTEN when I would watch Micah. It's hard for someone to understand unless they've been in the same situation exactly how taxing it is on your emotions. Feeling that way is completely normal and it will eventually pass, until they're teenagers and then we'll all be pulling our hair out again. :)
You're doing a great job, don't forget that. It's really hard to have a spouse thats out of town for work often, so that you goes days without a moment to yourself. Maybe a family member would watch him for a little while so you can do something just for you? Good luck!
Thanks for the support Katrina! I forgot that Tate travels a lot too and you're left to do it all yourself too.
ReplyDeleteIt's helpful to be reminded that this stage is normal and that other kids this age (and their parents) have their difficult days too. The mom guilt in me can't help but make me wonder if I were doing something differently or better that Oliver wouldn't be crying. Intellectually I understand physically and developmentally what's going on, (teething combined with lack of verbal communication ability) but emotionally it's more difficult to accept.
My brother-in-law has started coming over one night a week while Chris travels and that's a huge help. Unfortunately, yesterday Oliver had napped so poorly that by the time Andy showed up, I was putting Oliver to bed early, so they didn't get any time to hang out. But I got to the gym and Andy took advantage of our DirectTV, so still a good night for us both!