Breastfeeding Basics

Chris brags that he's willingly gone to breastfeeding class twice. He's just that awesome of a husband, right?. Well, if he admitted what happened the first time around, he'd blow his own cover, and mine too.

We had arrived at the classroom, the same one our prenatal class was held in the week before, but it was empty. A very sympathetic and helpful instructor, who had arrived early to set up for another class later in the evening, made a series of phone calls for us and learned that I had the right date and time for the class, but the wrong hospital. Oy vey. Some light tears later, (Okay, so it did go through my mind, if I get the wrong hospital for a class, what will I mess up when I go into labor?) I was at least was able to snag the last two spots in the class being held two weeks later, and officially rescheduled.

Our second attempt at attendance went off without a hitch. We had the correct location, we were on time, and despite that I've listened to every Pregtastic podcast there is on breastfeeding, I still found the class informative and worthwhile. In fact, I enjoyed it much more than the the prenatal class, which glossed over ever pregnancy and labor topic possible, while this was topic specific.

While Chris admitted it was probably good that he went, we're still not in agreement that the class was absolutely necessary. He reminded me that they teach all of this in the hospital, along with diaper changing and bathing the baby (two other things Chris and I have never done). His friend and his partner didn't bother with the class, even though she knew wanted to breastfeed, and he reported that she's doing fine. However, I don't think you can lump something as personal and emotional as breastfeeding in with diapers and baths. It's true that labor and delivery nurses are trained in basic breastfeeding techniques and most hospitals have a lactation specialist or consultant who can visit you within 24 hours of birth. However, in that time, the baby will have needed to feed multiple times, I will be exhausted and I'm so emotionally committed to breastfeeding, that I want to go in as prepared as possible for my own benefit. Because a lot can go awry.

Breastfeeding, in general, is not complicated, and sure women have been doing it since the beginning of time, but the mechanics is not actually instinctual (or so I've been told). Both babies and mothers can perform a piece of the process incorrectly enough to through the rhythm out of sink. A baby can have trouble latching on correctly. Or the mom might not figure out how to hold the baby in a comfortable position and suddenly question how she'll be able to put up with nursing 8-10 times a day. Breastfeeding has been compared to dancing, where you each may know the steps, but not the style at which your partner moves. Because of formula, no baby will starve, but each unsuccessful day of breastfeeding can lead to health complications for the mom and baby, frustration, and ultimately, giving up breastfeeding.

So I signed us up for a class offered through the hospital called Breastfeeding Basics. In two and a half hours, it covered the benefits of breastfeeding, how to prepare, avoiding and solving problems, and the role of the support person.

The latter is why Chris was there. Actually, the description of the class specifically instructed you to bring your support person and I ended up with some additional authority when we met a woman in our baby class who didn't know her husband was supposed to attend the breastfeeding class with her, and she felt like a loser for being the only one there without a partner. As she recounted the story over lunch in the hospital cafeteria, I interpreted the look on her husband's face as, "Don't be me."

There are two pieces in this becoming a parent adventure Chris is naturally and obviously excused from: labor and breastfeeding. He's attended appointments and a prenatal class and kept up on the stages of pregnancy. It's his kid too, after all. Even though only I can make the decision whether to breastfeed or not, (they are my breasts, after all) I think it's important that he be just as informed. Two minds are better than one, so even though we received more information in those two and a half hours than we could actually process and remember, we've both received the same basic information and can help each other in those first few weeks after birth. I don't think I'll have the patience to explain basic breastfeeding concepts, and he'd be hearing it second-hand, anyway, instead of from the instructor with an advanced degree and 24 years experience. Meanwhile, the nurse or lactation consultant at the hospital won't have to help him play catch-up during the precious time she has to work with the baby and me. Just as I haven't spent any significant time with babies and nursing mothers, Chris had to be introduced to this foreign world of breast pumps, a new vocabulary with terms like engorgement, let down and colostrum and a lifestyle altered to accommodate round-the-clock feedings and pumping and freezing milk. The class helped us transition from breastfeeding as a theory - something we supported, something we knew other people do - to a reality with all the physical, logistical and emotional details.

One belief surrounding breastfeeding that hasn't changed after the class and all the research I've done is that it really is a personal choice. Just as I feel the pull towards doing anything less than a natural, unmedicated birth is considered an injustice to your child, I sense a shame out there among women who don't want to or can't breastfeed. The "Breast is Best" movement has done a lot to encourage women to breastfeed and support those who choose to do so. I do believe breast milk is better than formula, but formula is still good. I remind myself that I was a formula-fed baby. And I'll admit that I want to breastfeed as much for the health benefits for me as for the baby, and the idea of breastfeeding as better for bonding than bottle feeding (oft mentioned in the pro-breastfeeding literature, but one I haven't been able to buy into yet) is less motivating than the thought of the cost savings (less often mentioned). I have the time and support, and hopefully when the baby is born, the patience and lack of complications. Breastfeeding is a logical option for me now, but not for every woman.