Formula Stockpile

A friend was clearing out her house in preparation to move and asked me if I wanted any of the formula samples her baby daughter had received. This was an offer coming from a woman who is a doctor and an ardent breast-feeding supporter, and who is still nursing her older child as he approaches two. I know that neither kid has had a sip of formula. Yet she had saved any freebies offered to her to pass along to friends and I eagerly accepted. I'm openly starting my own stockpile of formula in preparation for our fall arrival, despite the fact that I plan to breastfeed as much as possible.

If my experience breastfeeding number #2 is anything like it was with Oliver - overwhelming, constant sleep-deprivation and no time for pumping - I'll be using formula again. Except this time, I've vowed to not feel guilty about it and ignore anyone who gives me a holier-than-thou attitude.

I still believe that breastmilk is best for babies under most circumstances, but my own breastfeeding experience, even while overall positive, made me a firmer believer in having the right to choose how you want to feed your child. Yes, breastfeeding is the way nature intended, but in this era, we do have choices about many things regarding the well-being and raising of children. I realize now that there are MANY factors that go into whether a woman will try to breastfeed, continue to breastfeed, how her baby will get breastmilk (breast or bottle) and whether she will even be able to breastfeed, how long, how much, whether she will love the experience, hate it or feel somewhat indifferent, whether her child will self-wean or whether she makes the call and at what point. And I also have a bigger-picture perspective now that I've already raised another one, (well, at least into toddlerhood) and have seen that how you choose to feed your infant is just one of many decisions you'll make in your child's life. I had felt so guilty at first about giving Oliver formula, but since then, I've made countless other decisions that will impact his physical health and relationship with food, that the breastmilk versus formula feels narrow-focused. Even before I weaned Oliver at a year, we started him on solids (at six months) and then cow's milk (at 11 months, which started to replace formula feedings and then breastfeeding at a year) and thus began the decision-making on what to feed him, when to feed him and how to model healthy habits and table manners. I'm as proud of some of those decisions, such as fostering a healthy attitude about food and portion size by offering him a variety of foods, letting to choose what to eat or not to eat out of what is offered, having him sit down for snacks and meals, and not creating "forbidden" foods by sharing my sweet-tooth-satisfying treats with him, as I am by the fact that I breastfed him.