Soren is Five!

Soren has the last of the fall birthdays for the boys in our family and left his four-year-old "triplet" siblings behind by turning five. After watching his brothers and dad get attention, gifts and cake on their birthdays, it was finally his turn. He was so excited that he made his own birthday crown. 

Although Soren is five and headed to kindergarten next year, there's still so much little boy in him that makes my heart melt. We've never been co-sleepers, but one night Soren climbed into our bed for no reason and it was so comforting to roll over and feel him sleeping soundly next to me. He's an awesome cuddler! I could snuggle him all night (but am still thankful we upgraded to a king-size bed when we came home with Kiera and Matteo). He has a cute lisp and like a lot of kids his age, can't say the "r" sound, so "real" sounds like "weal". Sometimes the "l" sound is challenging, so Oliver sounds more like "Owiver".  And even though he's capable of getting himself dressed, he still wants me to dress him in the morning. He couldn't articulate why he wants me to do that, but when I suggested that perhaps it  made him feel loved and cared for, he solemnly nodded his head yes.

Pre-kindergarten is growing on Soren. He seemed lukewarm about the idea at first, but more and more, he reports that school was the best. Perhaps he needed to get used to the "rigor" that is Pre-K. Nina recounted the afternoon he came home from what must have been an exhausting day for him because he heaved a big sigh as he hung up his book bag and jacket. He turned to Nina and announced that Pre-K was so hard; it was like going to work. He wasn't trying to exaggerate or being whiny. In his mind it was the honest truth.

The good news is that all that hard work means Soren will be more than ready for kindergarten and to join his brother at the German school next year. He knows most of his letters and can count to at least 10. He loves being read to, but now that he's been listening to the chapter books we read to Oliver, he's at the point where he can follow along and is as interested as Oliver is. Oliver checks out a book in German each week at his school's library and although Soren doesn't understand German yet, he still listens intently when Nina or I read aloud in German.   

Like his once-fearful siblings, Soren pretty much gotten over his fear of dogs. Hurrah! Watson can still be a little much for him, but he's fine with Lulu, our neighbor's 90-pound Labradoodle.  He surprised us by asking if he could invite Ernie, a friend's elderly Beagle, to his birthday party.

It's convenient for Soren that he's not so afraid of dogs anymore because he enjoys playing with Paloma, whose dog is that previously mentioned large Labradoodle. Every afternoon he and Oliver beg us to let them go next door and ask if Paloma can play. Legos are still their main obsession, but Paloma also introduced them to Star Wars. 

Soren is currently wearing 4T pants and just moved into 5T shirts when the weather turned colder. For the time-being he has his wardrobe to himself, but by this winter when Matteo is predicted to outgrow his 3T pants, Soren will have to part with half his wardrobe. 

Pre-K

My "twins" started Pre-K today.  Don't they look so ready and full of promise?

We opted to send Kiera and Soren to Pre-K at the school down the street from our house to not only take advantage of free tuition, but also the routine of going five afternoons a week and extra support and services for Kiera.  There are 20 students in the class and four teachers, one of whom is an early childhood special education teacher. A speech therapist working exclusively at the school will provide Kiera's speech services in the classroom. 

I came home at lunchtime so I could walk with them to their first day of school.  Soren told me he was both nervous and excited.

The students and their parents gathered outside, but when the teachers asked the kids to line up, Soren started to cry. Just as it is for his older brother, new places and new people are tough for Soren. As I comforted him, I was surprised at how teary-eyed I became, even though I knew that with time, Soren is going to love school. He settled down, and when the line of children started to file into the building, he sought out comfort from his sister by grasping her hand and walked semi-confidently side-by-side with her into the building.

Despite a couple of emotional moments during the rest of his afternoon at preschool, Soren gave the experience a thumbs up. He reported that he probably won't cry tomorrow, or maybe just a little.

Kiera was also excited to start Pre-K and if she was nervous, she didn't show it. She generally goes with the flow in new situations. Her teacher reported that she didn't communicate more than with some nodding of her head, which I wasn't surprised by given it's a new environment, but she was otherwise engaged in the activities and happy to be there.  When I asked her what she did at school, the most I got out of her was "played".

From these quiet and nervous beginnings, I can't wait to see what this year as in store for Kiera and Soren.

Soren Update: 4.5 Years

Many nights I read bedtime stories to the kids in my bed and once we're finished, Soren wants me to carry him to bed. I pick him up and carry him like a baby and pretend to rock him and tell him how I remember when he really was a little baby and I carried him in my arms all the time. I try to lay him down just as gently as I did when he was a newborn and I'd lay him in his crib, except he's so heavy that as I lean over I end up dropping him into bed. He soaks up this tender, loving "babying" type of attention. 

Soren is a sensitive kid.  Celina usually gets the kids dressed in the morning, but so often Soren holds out and demands that I get him dressed.  I asked him why he wanted me to get him dressed so badly when he could do it himself and he shrugged his shoulders and looked down at his feet as if he were embarrassed.  He clearly couldn't articulate why, but I think it's just comforting for him. 

He has a routine every morning where he has to wave to me "from the window and the sidewalk."  I hug and kiss him goodbye and as I leave out the front door, he races the couple steps up the staircase where there's a little window that looks out onto the porch and he waves at me furiously.  I stand on the porch and wave back and blow kisses. When I get out to the sidewalk, I've got to stop and repeat the waves and kisses. In one last frantic goodbye, Soren races out onto the porch and props open the storm door and yells, "I love you and I miss you and I'll see you at dinnertime!" 

So this is the routine every morning, except if Chris happens to be home.  Then I'm chopped liver from Soren and his brothers.  At least Kiera still pays me some attention.  But Soren? He's like his brothers and is a total daddy's boy.  He's often Chris' sidekick helping him on projects around the house.  When Chris needed to replace the frame around our storm door, Soren accompanied him to Home Depot and then helped him measure the lumber.  I was folding laundry in my bedroom and looked out the window into the backyard and there was Soren helping Chris carry a piece of lumber from the garage. Chris could have easily carried it himself, but patiently let his four-and-a-half-year-old helper carry half the load.   

As attached as Soren is to both Chris and me, he's showing signs of independence.  He now joins Oliver to play at the neighbor's house, something he's until recently been terrified to do given their exuberant and forever young Labradoodle.  Soren still wants to keep sweet Lulu at a distance, but he now trusts that Lulu will be kept away from him until she can calm down and leave the kids alone.  He's starting to be able to play on Oliver and Paloma's level and they seemingly welcome his company.

Soren has generally liked going to preschool, but lately he really looks forward to it. I don't know if it's because Oliver talks so positively about his own school that his excitement has rubbed off on Soren, but regardless, Soren is pretty jazzed when he finds out it's a preschool day. 

Soren is still into Legos, of course, but also enjoys riding his bike, coloring, building with Magnatiles and playing with Kiera's dollhouse.  He might play with it as much, or even more than, Kiera.  One day he was spent and kept saying he was tired and wanted to go home and play with the dollhouse. 

Soren continues to be a relatively picky-eater and if Oliver gets going on not liking something, he can bring Soren down with him.  Luckily, if left with no other options, Soren will eventually try what he had previously refused to touch. 

With the changing of the seasons, we also changed out Soren's wardrobe.  He's still in size 4T shirts, but can fit in some 5T's and is now wearing 4T pants.  Chris took him shoe shopping a few weeks ago and I was shocked that he's now in size 10.5.  (Also shocked, because he walked into the shoe store wearing size eight shoes on his feet.)

Soren at Four Years Old

Chris said he just loves the age Soren is now.  He's playful and sweet and full of imagination.  Plus it can't hurt that he's a daddy's boy.  Like his brothers, Soren is all about dad.  He likes to go wherever Chris goes, whether it's on another Home Depot run or outside to do yard work.  Of course Chris loves this age, he's got a sidekick! 

Meanwhile, I'm mourning the fact that Soren doesn't necessarily want snuggle with me anymore at bedtime.  I still get hugs and kisses, but not the snuggles where he pulls me close until my cheek presses against his.  It breaks my heart, even though he demonstrates that he still needs his mommy.  The mornings are particularly cute/pitiful when I leave for work.  A single hug - or 10 - won't do.  He's got to follow me out the door and get another hug on the porch and then as I walk to the car he needs to open the storm door and scream/cry/desperately proclaim that he loves me and that he's going to miss me.  On more than one occasion, he was getting dressed when I left and he came flying out of the house in his underwear, or that he time he came out in nothing but his socks.  I tell you, we provide endless entertainment for the neighbors. 

On a recent workday morning, I didn't have to say goodbye to him.  He had been sick the day before and couldn't go to preschool and I was home sick from work too.  My other kids were at school and as I lay in bed trying to rest, Soren played quietly with his Legos just outside my bedroom.  I snuggled under the covers and listened to him talk out loud to himself about what he was making with his Legos and to the stories he created as he played. It was an unusual kind of background noise, but so soothing, and at that moment I wished I could have bottled up his four-year-old innocence. 

There's nothing sadder than a kid sick on his birthday and that unfortunately was the case for Soren.  He rang in his fourth year with a super high fever and no appetite, not even for cake.  All the fun things we had planned for his birthday, which was an unusually warm 83-degree day, pretty much went out the window.  The good news is that his birthday cupcakes weren't going to go bad if we put them aside for a day or two until he got better.  He was feeling well enough the next day that we were able to pick up where we had left off and finally feasted on the lemon cupcakes with vanilla frosting that he had requested. 

After I posted Soren's birthday pictures on Facebook and later an old picture from my father-in-law's birthday 29 years ago, my sister-in-law sent us two photos side-by-side to highlight the resemblance she noticed between Soren and his Uncle Andy.  I regretted cutting Soren's hair right before his birthday, because if I'd left his blond mop, he would have looked that much more like his uncle.  It's funny how we had never noticed the resemblance before.  

Soren at age four and his Uncle Andy at age two and a half.

The Fishhook

I got the call every parent fears, the call that one of my children had been injured.  The call came in from Celina's phone, but it wasn't Celina on the other end, but rather a man who told me he was with Celina and Soren had hurt his leg and they were all headed to the hospital.  I immediately gathered my things and left for the hospital, which was thankfully only a five-minute drive away.  Before I arrived though, I received a text from my mother-in-law that she too was on her way and that she didn't know exactly what had happened, but thought that Celina and the kids might have been involved in a car accident.  I panicked as I thought of all the possibilities of what could have happened.

When I was finally reunited with Soren in the emergency room, I was relieved to see that he was not gravely injured, his leg had not been broken, our minivan had not been in an accident and Celina, our au pair, was not in a puddle of tears, as I would have been had our roles been reversed.  My son, however, had a fishhook stuck in his leg.  Yes, a fish hook.

After Celina left to take our good Samaritan home, I was left to explain to the emergency room technician who was clipping four feet of line from Soren's newly-embedded fish hook what had happened.  She looked at me quizzically, as did everyone else we met that afternoon, as I explained the little bit Celina had told me.  They were headed to get ice cream, Soren tripped on the sidewalk, skinned his knee, and ended up with a fish hook in his calf.  No, they weren't fishing.  No, it wasn't our fish hook.  No, he wasn't playing with it.  No, I have no idea what a fish hook was doing there on the ground.  The more I explained, the more I was surprised that Child Protective Services did not show up.

Soren had to have an x-ray so the doctor could see how deep the hook had penetrated and the results quickly ruled out being able to employ the "string pull method" and we talked other options.  I opted for the Ketamine, which put Soren into a sedative state and protected him from memories of the painful Lidokaine shots and the doctor having to push the barb out another section of his calf, clipping the hook, and pulling the remaining piece of the barb out through the other hole.  The method had sounded straight-forwarded, so I was surprised by how much pushing and yanking was required to get the job done.

As I waited for Soren to rouse from the sedation, I commented to the nurse tending to Soren about his dumb luck.  He couldn't have done this to himself again if he tried I said.  The nurse laughed, but then estimated the hospital sees about 275 cases a year involving fishhooks.  In fact, Soren's case will probably end up as part of some study about how the hospital treats people impaled by fishhooks.  Two-hundred seventy-five I asked him incredulously.  He shrugged his shoulders and responded, "Well, it is the Land of 10,000 Lakes."  This kind of stuff just happens.

Even though this experience was traumatic for Soren, it reminded me how much I have to be thankful for - our au pair whose maturity and composure defies her 20 years of age, a stranger who helped her and drove with her to the hospital, my mother-in-law who kept us company during the long wait and the hospital staff who provided the best care possible to a terrified little boy. 

These Three Are Off to Preschool

Oliver started kindergarten two weeks ago and my other three finally had their first day of preschool today.  It was an extra special day for Matteo, because after accompanying his three older siblings to school last spring, he got to walk into school, not as a younger sibling, but as a classmate.  Due to a mixed-age class and a teacher willing to be flexible with a September 1 age cut-off, (Matteo won't be three until the end of the month) Soren, Kiera and Matteo are all in the same preschool class this year.  When I learned that there are only nine kids in the class, their teacher pointed out that if my kids get sick, there goes a third of the class!

Aren't little kids with book bags just so adorable?

Celina dropped them off on their first day and reported that everything went very well.  Kiera and Matteo knew exactly what to do and were happy to be there.  Soren also did better than we expected since he only needed a few extra hugs and reassurance.  It warms my heart that they like school and am thankful for those three mornings a week they get to play with other kids their age. These next two years are precious to me because they're the only time these three will spend in the same class together before they're going to be split up across two grades. 

Soren Update: 3.5 Years

Soren is in an odd position in our family right now.  He's close in age to his "virtual triplet" siblings, but often appears so much more developmentally advanced than Kiera and Matteo, who are still playing catch-up in many areas. The reality is that Soren is more advanced in many ways, such as being the only one of the three who can carry on a conversation.  For the time-being Soren has a lot more in common with Oliver, who he likes to build Legos with and engages in play with him that looks more collaborative than the parallel play Kiera and Matteo exhibit.  Yet it's not fair to compare him with Oliver either, who is two years older.  Soren is not new to this family like Kiera and Matteo are, who as a result, are given a lot of leeway in acclimating, and he's not old enough to process the last few months of change in the way Oliver can.  I need to remind myself that he's only three and a half. 

The first few weeks after we got home from China were pretty emotional for Soren.  So many people suggest that his feelings are the result of all the change in his life, whereas I see a little boy who held it together when his parents went away for three weeks and then let all his anxiety out once we returned.  He was happy we returned, even happy that we brought two new siblings with us, but those weeks were about learning to trust that we weren't going to leave him again.

Being tired probably also affects Soren's emotions. He hasn't napped for months now and if he does, he's awake until it's my bedtime.  He generally does fine, but that does not mean he isn't tired.  If we're driving somewhere in the afternoon, more often than not, he falls asleep. He's always been a pretty laid-back kid who doesn't meltdown when he's tired, but that doesn't mean he doesn't get sensitive.  I've just accepted that he's at the age where he's too old to nap, but too young to make it through the day. 

We came home from China surprised that Soren had started to refuse to wear pull-ups to bed and had been waking up dry.  We thought we were officially past the potty-training stage with him until he had a string of nighttime accidents not long after our return.  We encouraged him to give pull-ups another try and because we were exhausted, we were relieved he agreed, even if reluctantly. 

One thing Soren has become particularly sensitive to is having his picture taken. It's like having to stand and smile for the camera is too much pressure for him and he breaks down weeping.  I'm still holding out hope I'll get one much-sought-after photograph of all four of my children smiling for the camera, but until then, I have three wild cards (they don't fall apart crying, but they might or might not smile and might or might not look at the camera at the same time) and a fourth I can guarantee will have his head turned away and tears streaming down his face. 

Having his picture taken aside, Soren is much happier and less clingy these days. What has helped him, besides just time, has been getting back into our old routine, even if a big part of that routine involved me being back at work.  I leave for work and come home the same time each day and he is then with our au pair or at preschool.  As with most kids, this predictability is comforting for him.

Chris thinks we have a budding sports fanatic.  He reports that Soren likes to talk sports with him; although, I'm not sure how extensive that kind of conversation is at this point.  But every day he would inquire if the Wild were playing.  He would have worn his Wild jersey or Vikings t-shirt every day if he could have, but mysteriously, those two articles of clothing were often "in the wash".  Then one day he went looking for one his special shirts in his dresser and said with a tone of dismay, "None of my clothes are in here." What he was looking at were the next size up of clothes I had pulled from boxes of Oliver's old clothes.  Meanwhile, his beloved Wild jersey and Vikings t-shirt were passed down to Matteo.  

Soren also inherited Oliver's old bike.  Until this point, he'd ridden a tricycle, but now he has a real bike with training wheels.  He loves riding it.  It took him a few falls before he mastered the brakes, but he does great with it now. 

Now that the weather is warming up, Soren loves being outside.  Just like his brothers and sister, he wants to be outside as much as possible.  If they're playing outside when I come home from work, I have to grit and bear a lot of whining before I can get them indoors for dinner and once that's finished, they beg to go outside again until bedtime.  

My (Healthy) Little Peanuts

With fall birthdays for my children, we get through the annual wellness visit, one of the semi-annual dentist visits and flu vaccinations in one fell swoop.  The kids started with dentist appointments, which went better than expected considering that both kids actually sat in the chair and more or less complied with instructions (Oliver more so than Soren).  When the hygienist told Oliver he must be doing a good job brushing because his teeth and gums looked so healthy, I couldn’t help but tell her that meant I was doing a good job brushing. She was quite happy to hear that I actually brush the kids’ teeth, which she instructs all parents to do.  Yes! Scored a “good mom” point there.  But then the dentist came in and announced that Oliver has a cavity.  I guess my brushing isn’t quite as stellar as I had thought.  

I’m often questioned why I bring my kids to the dentist when they’re so young.  Trying to convince people there’s a purpose in taking care of and treating teeth that are going to eventually fall out must be a constant battle dentists face.  Even I have questioned why, but it turns out Oliver's cavity is a good example of why it's important I keep bringing them in.  The cavity is in one of his molars, which he’s going to have until he’s 10 or 11 years old.  The dentist explained that cavities can spread slowly through the enamel, but once they penetrate the softer part of the tooth, the decay of the entire tooth can happen pretty quickly - in less than a year.  The thought of a tooth decaying in my otherwise healthy five-year-old's mouth was enough to book the appointment to have it filled without giving the decision much more thought.  

At their wellness check-ups, the boys came away with a glowing report of good health.  They're still tiny little guys, but healthy!  

Soren

• 28.8 pounds (17th percentile)
• 35.5 inches (10th percentile)

Oliver

• 37.4 pounds (22th percentile)
• 41 inches (13th percentile)  

When the doctor came in, he asked Oliver a ton of questions.  Thankfully Oliver had the right answers.  He insisted he loves broccoli and emphasized that he eats fruit at lunch every day.  (Okay the second part is at least true.)  He never mentioned the fruit snacks Dad lets him buy when they go grocery shopping together or the cookies he talks me into giving him.  Oliver loved showing off how high he could count and how he could balance on one foot.  He had all sorts of things to tell the doctor, which meant, unfortunately, that Soren never really got a chance to talk.  So that the doctor wouldn't think he was mute, I finally had to interrupt Oliver to tell him to let his brother answer first. 

Happy 3rd Birthday to Soren!

My little guy is three. Soren still has the sweetness of a baby, but the budding, stubborn independence so typical for kids his age.  Shrieks of "I do it!" are heard more often at our house and a simple task like throwing a used diaper in the trash can turn into hysterics if he wants to do it and isn't allowed to.  I've always said he's my easy-going child, but I think three is going to be the year he challenges that!

Just like Oliver did at this age, Soren is starting that slow, frustrating process towards dropping naps all together.  Whether he naps at all and for how long have been hit or miss, but at least we have noticed a pattern.  If there's else going on during nap time, he'd rather be doing that instead of napping.  Therefore, he usually naps the afternoons Oliver has preschool.  But again, this is a slow process, so the lack of sleep eventually catches up with him and he wants to nap no matter what else is going on.  Whether he naps or not, he has difficulty falling asleep at night, which has been challenging on Chris and me who look forward to our peace and quiet once the kids have gone to bed!

What Soren shows no progress towards is potty-training.  He seemed very interested in it months ago and even insisted on going to daycare with no diapers a couple of times.  We've never even used a potty chair with him and instead managed to get him used to sitting on the toilet.  Although he knows how to use the toilet, it's clear he hasn't learned to recognize when he has to go.  So we stepped back from toilet-training and are letting Soren more self-awareness before giving it another try.  

Soren loves preschool.  Thank goodness, because he always wanted to hang out in Oliver's classroom at drop-off and was so proud when he got his first book bag, but with all the transitions the last year, I wasn't sure he was going to change his mind about this whole preschool thing.  Drop-offs were a little rough the first few weeks, but nothing out of the ordinary for a barely-three-year-old.  He only has four other kids in his class and typical for his age, he names his teacher as his favorite friend at school.

It's strange to have a blond child, well dirty-blond really, but given no one in my family has anything close to blond hair, his looks very blond to me.  And friends have commented that his hair looks blonder, although I'm attributing that to a summer spent in the sun.  Before anyone starts making jokes about mailmen, Chris had blond hair as a kid, even though it's now as brown as mine.

Soren's pronunciation has been slow and coming.  He especially has trouble saying the "s" sound.  But just in the last week or two we noticed that he's starting to pronounce his name correctly, and not "Oren."  He hasn't 100% mastered the "s" sound, so if I hear him stumble on a word, I try to see if I can get him to repeat it correctly.  One day he asked for a spoon and after a couple rounds of me trying to get him to say it correctly and him responding with "poon," he finally matter-of-factually said, "I want one of those."  Way to adapt. 

Soren's fear of dogs is still pretty intense, but we're starting to see him  open up to them.  He still flips out most of the time (and I mean utterly and completely lose it), but if he has an opportunity to warm up to the idea, (that is the dog doesn't approach him, look at him, surprise him with its presence, and so on) he might actually reach out his little hand for a quick pet.  Unfortunately I forgot to mention Soren's fear of dogs to our au pair, but he quickly figured it out when he took the kids to their first playdate and the family had a dog, the most docile, lethargic Lab one has probably ever met.  When I asked Soren what they did with the dog when he was scared, he said in a timid little voice, "The doggie had to go to his woom."

After the party the week before his birthday, Soren's actual birthday was quite low-key.  We spent the morning at the park with friends and he got Izzy's ice cream for dessert that evening.  He was also quite excited to open his birthday presents to find a Mickey Mouse movie and Heatwave, the transformer.  

Roommates

Oliver and Soren are officially roommates.  I hope they like sharing a room because they're pretty much stuck in the same jail cell-size bedroom for the next decade!

We've been talking about moving Soren into Oliver's room ever since we started the adoption process so we could turn Soren's room into the new sibling's bedroom.  We bought a bunk bed ahead of the transition, but never actually followed through and Oliver ended up sleeping on the bottom bunk while the promises/threats of Soren moving in never materialized.  It was too easy to keep them in separate rooms where we didn't have to worry about one waking up the other or trying to coordinate bedtimes.  The few times the boys had begged for a "sleepover," no sleeping actually happened and we sent Soren back to his room for the rest of the night.  We were finally in a good place with the kids and sleep and we were hesitant to mess up our progress.  

The looming start to our house renovation finally pushed us to make the transition to the boys sharing a room.  The contractors are going to end up punching a hole through the wall of Soren's room, so he (and all his stuff) needed to be out of there.  Chris took the kids up to the cabin one weekend and my mother-in-law, brother-in-law and sister-in-law helped me move furniture, box up outgrown clothes, toys and books a future child will hopefully use some day, and find space for Soren's things in what is already a tiny bedroom.

While I was sentimental about Soren leaving his "baby room," he thankfully didn't seem to miss it.  On their first night home from the cabin, he seemed perfectly happy with his new digs.  We went about our usual bedtime routine read them books on the floor of their new shared room, then tucked Oliver into his top bunk and Soren into the bottom bunk and turned out the lights.  The room was silent.

If only it had been as easy as that!  Not long after lights out, I heard the pitter-patter of feet.  Two-plus hours and about 37 trips upstairs later, both kids were finally asleep.  The next night it only took a little over an hour for them to fall asleep and bedtime has generally gotten better with each night.  

Soren Update: 2.5 Years

Soren loves waving at dogs and saying hi to them, which is ironic, because he's still terrified of them. If someone out walking a dog sees cute little kid waving at his or her dog, the person rightly assumes the kid wants to pet the dog.  However as soon as the dog is within two feet of Soren, he screams and the dog-owner ends up apologizing because he or she assumes the dog must have done something to purposefully scare Soren.

Soren talks up a storm now, but unfortunately, it's very difficult to understand him.  I often resort to asking Oliver for a translation.  I remember being worried about Oliver's speech development, but when I looked back at my blog post for him at this same age, I noted that he, too, was difficult to understand.  And he has no problems communicating now.

Then there are magical moments when Soren spouts out a multi-word sentence and speaks it clear as day.  And I think Soren can no longer be considered a baby, but instead a little boy with thoughts and opinions of his own.  

At bedtime, Soren still wants to climb into bed and adjust his blankets and stuffed animals all just so before I read him his book, and he still wants a cuddle and a kiss before I leave his room for the night, but he no longer pulls me close and if I try to snuggle and nuzzle him too closely, he actually pushes me away.  As minor as this little mark of independence from mom and dad is, it nevertheless makes me sad. 

Soren goes to bed easily and happily, as long as you don't scrimp on the bedtime story, but gosh is this kid not really a morning person.  He has such an easy-going personality, but lately he's been sleeping later (not complaining there!) and when I wake him to get him ready for daycare, he protests loudly and throws his covers over his head or flips himself over and buries his head face-first in his pillow.  It's like he's a teenager.  I leave the light on and go about my morning routine and usually a few minutes later he wants a hug and is finally ready to start his day. 

He's showing other signs of independence by wanting to do more things for himself.  We have a new stool in the kitchen that has two steps to it and he very quickly figured out that if he drags it over to his booster seat or the bar stool, he can climb in and out of the chair by himself and it's clear he likes this independence. He tries to put his shoes on by himself (even though he only manages to get his toes in) and sometimes shows in interest in helping me dress him.  He still lets me pick out his clothes, but definitely has his favorite pieces of clothing, like the shirt with two bears on it.  Before he will put the shirt on, he has to point to the larger bear and yell, "Daddy bear!" And then he puts to the smaller bear and yells, "Soren!"

He still wants to be babied when going up or down the stairs, at which point he raises his little arms up towards me and says, "Carry me." If I'm not carrying something I oblige, because it's a moment where my little boy is still a little boy. 

And little he still is.  Because the size 18-month pants are too short, we moved Soren into size 2T pants, but we have the roll the pants legs up to make them fit.  The 2T tops fit him quite well.  Most of Soren's wardrobe used to belong to Oliver and seeing him in those clothes brings back memories of when Oliver was his age. 

Minnesota recently experienced a few days of spring and it got warm enough that I had to open the windows on our second level to let the air circulate.  Because of the open windows, our neighbors who were enjoying an al fresco dinner on their patio, were serenaded with the screams and wails of my children taking their baths.  Soren is back to really, really hating baths.  Which is why this winter we only bathed the kids about once a week because that's all we had the energy for.  But once summer arrives and they come home from daycare covered in sweat, sand and sunscreen, daily baths will be a necessity.  I need to brace myself now.  And maybe gift the neighbors a box of earplugs.

Even though Soren really dislikes baths, there's a lot he loves.  Like his blocks, trains, books, building forts out of blankets and couch cushions, stuffed animals, drawing, painting and doing ANYTHING Oliver is doing.  He remains a good eater for being a toddler.  He goes through stages where he's pickier than other times, but you can put almost anything in front of him without fear of a huge protest.  He might not eat it, but he doesn't scream about it, and if it sits in front of him long enough, he might even start nibbling.  Right now he loves granola bars, raisins, animal crackers, cheese, yogurt, sandwiches, pasta, pancakes, waffles, oh, and tofu.  When I serve him a dish with tofu, that's the only part of the dish he eats!  And with gusto! His milk consumption has finally slowed down.  I remember Oliver's interest in drinking milk with meals dropped off pretty suddenly around age two, but Soren still wants a sippy cup of milk with most meals, even if he doesn't drink the amount he used to.  

Like Oliver, it took Soren weeks to fully get in the groove of daycare.  And when he did, he didn't look back at me when I dropped him off in his classroom, and, instead, headed straight for the group of kids gathered around the table where the morning activity was set out.  Exactly a week later they transitioned Soren to an older classroom and the crying and lunging for me when I tried to leave started all over again.  Luckily, a transition to a new classroom was easier than starting at a new daycare, and after a week, he started marching into daycare each morning like he owned the place.  And it warms my heart when the teachers from his old classroom coo over him in the hallway and tell me how much they miss him.  He's already made an impact on his new teachers, one of whom told me Soren is her favorite and then gushed about what a good-natured kid he is and how well he gets along with all the other kids.  I'm sure they tell all parents that, but gosh, it still made me proud.   

With all that he does at daycare, it's no wonder when the weekend rolls around and you ask him what he wants to do, he tells you that he either wants to stay home or play at home.  Despite the endless source of energy toddlers appear to be, even they need some time to chill out and enjoy down-time. 

Soren Update: 25 Months

Soren's independence continues to grow, but in true toddler fashion, he still needs his hugs of reassurance.  He often gives impromptu hugs.  He breaks from his play just long enough to give you a hug, pauses for another moment and then continues what he was doing.  If he falls or hurts himself, he seeks our arms and wails for a minute or two and then is wiggling out again wanting to return to the fun.  I just love that feeling of being the one who can soothe him.  I can literally feel him relax in my embrace. 

Although his little toddler hugs remind me how sweet Soren is, he's picked up some naughty behavior from Oliver.  It's amazing how much he copies Oliver, even when Oliver misbehaves.  Oliver swatted at Chris in anger about being told no and before Chris even had a chance to reprimand Oliver, Soren gleefully swatted at Chris too.  We spend a lot of time telling Soren, "hands are for hugging" and if we see him look like he's going to hit, we repeat our mantra and ask him to show us what he's supposed to do with his hands.  It works - if we can catch him in time. 

Soren is one of those kids who loves his stuffed animals.  He's so cute when he play pretend with them.  He got a Snoopy to go with his Charlie Brown costume and he tries to have Snoopy drink from his sippy cup or suck on his pacifier. One day he read his stuffed animals a bedtime story, which consisted of him tucking the animals in then just holding up an open book in front of their faces.  Not only do his stuffed animals sleep in bed with them, but he's got to tuck his favorites under the covers with him when I tuck him in at night.  

Soren sometimes insists we set a place for Snoopy!

The penguin run has all but disappeared.  Just in the last month we noticed that Soren runs with his arm up-right instead of straight down and slightly back.  I'll really miss that run.   

Wellness Visit Updates

Oliver and Soren really love me right now.  They had back-to-back doctor's and dentist's appointments.  But they survived and came home with clean bills of health. 

Oliver was a lot more comfortable at the dentist than last year.  He cried about having to sit in the special chair, but settled down, let the hygienist take x-rays and then didn't freak out when I left the room to take Soren to have his teeth cleaned.  When I came back in to check on Oliver, he was following the hygienist's instructions - and gripping the arms of the chair with dear life.  He cried again when the dentist came in to inspect his teeth and apply fluoride, but his mood took a 180 when he was finally allowed to climb down from the chair.  With tears still staining his cheeks, he happily proclaimed, "It's Soren's turn!"

I reconfirmed that Soren does NOT like having his teeth cleaned.  I'll just leave it at that.  He has 15 teeth now and the only fun fact that came out of his visit is that he'll probably only end up with 19 of 20 baby teeth.  He's missing a lateral incisor and those usually erupt before age two and they're one of those most common baby teeth a kid could be missing, so the dentist's hunch for now is that he won't get one. 

The next morning the kids visited the doctor for the respective four-year and two-year wellness visits.  They were happy as could be in the waiting room, but as soon as the nurse called their names, Soren started to cry and that prompted Oliver to be clingy and anxious.  We hadn't even made it to the exam room and, let's just say, my kids had already announced their presence!  The nurses just chuckle when they see us coming.

Oliver is in the 25th percentile for both height and weight, at 39 inches tall and 32 pounds, 8 ounces. 

Soren is supposedly in the 25th percentile for height at 33 3/4 inches, but I was confident in the nurse's quick measurement on a kid who wasn't lying still, so I think he's more like 33 inches.  At 24 pounds and 2 ounces, he's in the 5th percentile for weight. 

I asked the doctor about Soren's monthly fevers.  He was in again last week and the doctor he saw it's normal for kids over the age of six months to catch a virus on average once a month.  I followed up with Soren's pediatrician at his wellness visit, because while I understand young kids can seem like they're constantly sick, like they have a running nose or unsettling cough that seems to last all winter, Soren's illnesses come at regular intervals of three to four weeks.  He has a high fever for about three days, with few other symptoms, and then it's gone.  The doctor says for kids experiencing what I described, there might be something more serious going on than just catching another virus.  But he ruled out anything too concerning given that Soren is following his growth curves perfectly and he rebounds quickly and well from each episode.  So instead of putting him through extensive test for something he'll probably grow out of, his doctor and I decided we'd take a wait-and-see approach. 

Happy Birthday Soren

Soren turning two years old is especially nostalgic because Oliver was the same age when Soren was born.  I look at Soren and think he looks younger than I remembered Oliver at two.  But perhaps that's because, expecting a new baby, I saw Oliver older than he actually was.  He was about to become a big brother and as much as I had wanted him to stay a baby, I also needed him to grow up.  So Soren's second birthday, an otherwise exciting and joying time, triggered a sense of feeling off, like something was  missing.  At this point in my life, as my youngest ascends from baby to toddler, I felt like I should be bringing a new baby into the world, just as I had when Oliver was two. 

With no new baby to come after him, Soren's second birthday was bittersweet.  I've always called Soren my little baby, but as I kissed him goodnight on the night before his birthday, I realized that was probably the last time I could call him that. 

While I was feeling pretty sappy and nostalgic that night, I woke up excited the next morning.  I had taken the morning off work so I could do something fun with Soren to mark his birthday.  I was thankful I had those few hours off since Oliver's birthday had fallen on a Sunday and he had gotten a weekend's worth of birthday celebration with mom and dad and other family. 

After dropping Oliver off at preschool, we took the bus downtown to the Science Museum.  Soren loves trucks, buses, cars and trains, so riding on a bus was quite a treat!  I really think he enjoyed that more than the museum.  We spent the rest of the morning taking in the sights of downtown, running up and down the sidewalks, watching the boats and trains pass by along the river and even taking in some of the museum, our original destination.  Time flew and we hopped back on the bus to Oliver's preschool. 

Birthdays are a time for reflection and I look at Soren and see a kid with tons of personality and his own interests.  Here's a boy who loves to dance and clap his hands. Soren got a CD player and a CD of kids dance music for his birthday and he started clapping his hands and stomping a foot when he saw what was underneath the wrapping paper.  We plugged in the CD player and Soren danced in circles until he was too dizzy to dance anymore.  I always listen to the radio in the car and sometimes a song will move him to bop his head and clap his hands.  He moves to the music like no one's watching.

Soren is really getting into pretend play and especially likes mimicking what he sees mom and dad do, like cooking or cleaning.  He got play kitchen for his birthday and loves it!  It drives me nuts that a pretend kitchen has been deemed a "girl" toy by toy marketers and that it's difficult to find one not splashed in pink.  But obviously Soren doesn't care about the color. I joke that both my kids are man enough to take on pink, and in all honesty, the pastels of Soren's new kitchen do complement the greys and whites of our basement walls quite well. 

Soren is saying a ton of words - more than I can count - and is still working on combining two words together for some semblance of a sentence.  Who knows if "Daddy work" means "Daddy is at work," "Daddy went to work" or "Daddy is going to work," but it's clear from his emotions that he misses Chris and knows he's at work. 

A lot of the words he says are a result of our direct conversation with him, as opposed to words that he says to us initiated on his own.  But it's clear he knows what he's talking about instead of just completely mimicking us.  Sometimes we go out to eat on a Friday evening and since it was Soren's birthday, we decided to let him pick.  Of the two kid-friendly restaurants we often go to, one is a pizza place and the other has mac and cheese on the menu.  So we asked Soren if he wanted pizza or mac and cheese and to our surprise, he answered us.  "Pizza!" he exclaimed with a smile. Since Oliver was lobbying hard for the mac and cheese, we asked Soren again and a third time and his answer was always pizza.  So that's what the birthday boy got. 

My kids' birthdays always trigger raw memories of their births and as I was getting Soren ready for bed the night before his birthday, I remembered two years before being in labor and wondering who this new son of mine was going to be.  Of course I could have played over in my head all possible scenarios for who this new little baby was going to be and still couldn't have imagined such a sweet, beautiful and loving boy.   

This will be the last of my monthly Soren updates.  It's not to say I won't post any more updates, just not on a regular basis.  It's been a joy to write about Soren's growth and development and I'm thankful I have this record of his first two years of life since they change so much at this stage.

Soren Update: 23 Months

Soren turns two next month and I've found myself referring to him as a baby more often.  I know I have limited time to be able to get away with that and I'm enjoying talking about my baby while I can.  Because babies don't have expanding vocabularies and climb to the top of the slide at the playground or try to ride their big brother's bike. 

Just recently we noticed that Soren is stringing two words together, like "Mommy go," when I leave the house or "more please."  You can hear the development of sentence structure and grammar.  There's still so much that I'm sure he knows how to say, whether in English or Portuguese, that we just don't realize he's saying.  A lot still sounds like babble unless it's in context and you're really paying attention. 

If it weren't fall, we'd consider getting Soren a bike with training wheels.  Oliver's 16-inch bike is way too big for Soren, but he shows interest in riding it and trying to peddle even though his feet don't reach.  While in Ocean City, we had rented Oliver a bike to so he could peddle to and from the beach instead of having to walk.  Sometimes that would be too tiring and he'd want to ride in the stroller.  But we hadn't brought the double stroller, so we set Soren on top of the bike and I'd pull the bike down the sidewalk by the handle bars while Soren gripped the handles like he was riding a motorcycle and propped his feet on the bottom of the frame.  He was thrilled!

Soren has been just as adventurous on the playground as he was riding on two wheels.  He's started climbing ladders on the playground and is only limited by his size in how high or what he'll climb.  He'll otherwise try to get up onto whatever you'll let him.  At least he's still into tamer playground activities, like digging in the sand and relaxing in a bucket swing. 

As Soren's gross motor skills improve, he's losing his "penguin" run, which makes me sad.  It was kind of a funny, but cute run, where he ran with his arms pointed straight down and his hands back.  Combine that with the toddler, straight-legged run, and well, he toddled like a penguin.  I thought maybe only I had noticed the penguin resemblance until my nanny and her Brazilian friends admitted they had nicknamed him pinguim. 

Soren is still a reasonably adventurous eater.  He might pout a little or look unexcited about what is for dinner, but he'll probably eventually try it.  He's not as enthusiastic about beans anymore, but still loves tofu.  And I can usually count on him to at least try a few bites of whatever random meals I serve up from my stash of meal exchange dinners.  Still, his favorites are your usual toddler staples - peanut butter toast, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, waffles, fruit, yogurt, snacks of any kind, and anything sweet.  One of his first words was "Cake!"  He loves cake so much that when our nanny told Oliver or Soren that they could either stay home with daddy or come with her to the bakery to pick up a cake for her husband's birthday, (she also promised to buy them a slice) Oliver chose to stay home and Soren dropped what he was doing, grabbed his shoes and booked to the front door.

For all the energy Soren has, he loves chilling out in the stroller for a long walk.  We still can't touch the stroller without Soren losing it until he can get in it.  Once he does, though, he's such a happy kid. 

Soren Update: 22 Months

Soren has hit the Terrible Two's.  I shouldn't be this surprised since I've seen the tantrums before, but Soren is our "mellow" one, so maybe that's what's caught me off guard.  His little outbursts have been cute until this point.  Then Oliver got a new bike, Soren saw it and had a down-and-out 30-minute tantrum.  Nothing could console him and we couldn't reason with him.  Honestly, Chris and I didn't know what to do with him. 

Then there's the shrieking.  Soren used to mostly just shriek with joy.  But now he shrieks if Oliver looks at him funny, comes near him or looks like he might possibly think about taking something Soren might possibly even remotely be interested in.  So that means that if Oliver and Soren are in the same room, there's usually some level of shrieking, crying and/or screaming going on. 

The commotion can reach such a high pitch (and stay there for an extended period of time) that I apologized to the neighbors in advance.  Since our houses are so close together and people often have their windows open, I'm embarrassed by how much my kids are potentially disturbing the entire neighborhood. 

In fairness to Soren, part of the reason behind his mood could be attributed to how often he's been getting sick, including two more times since last month's update. He's possibly been sick five or six times in as many months, but honestly, I've lost track.  The last time I took Soren to the doctor, he couldn't find anything a reason for his high fever, other than that it was probably a run-of-the-mill summer virus.  We were given the usual instructions to keep him hydrated and give him Ibuprofen and Tylenol to control the fever and to be thankful that he didn't have vomiting or diarrhea, which usually accompanies these types of illnesses.  Well, last Monday he was fine when he went to bed and when I checked on him in the morning, he had vomited in his bed and had a 103 fever.  This virus was a least the shortest-lived, but it still gave him enough time to throw up on our nanny and his car seat and require us to do three loads of laundry in 24 hours. 

Tantrums and illnesses aside, there's still plenty of joy and wonder experienced as a parent of a toddler. Soren still imitates everything Oliver does.  Oliver noticed our neighbor's cat sunning herself on the front walk and he bent down to take a look at her.  Soren walked up next to him and bent down and looked at the cat.  Oliver meowed at the cat.  Soren meowed at the cat.  Oliver stood up.  Soren stood up.  And so on. 

Soren is also imitating more and more words.  He picks a random word from a sentence he just overheard and repeats it.  If Oliver says, "I want to go to the park today," Soren repeats "park" softly to no one in particular.  Many of the words I've never heard him say on his own or in context, but it's interesting that he can still isolate a word in a sentence and say it correctly. 

Although Soren can still fit in 18-month shirts and 12-month pants, I might be getting close to boxing those clothes up for good.  I thought he'd never grow out of them. At his last doctor's appointment, he topped out at 22 pounds and three ounces.  He's still wearing size four diapers.

For all the sleep problems we've had the past few months, Soren is finally going to bed without much fuss.  Remaining consistent with bedtime and the routine is surprising proving to be more crucial for peaceful bedtimes for Soren than it was for Oliver, who as a baby and toddler melted down in the blink of an eye if you pushed his limits on his need for sleep.  Soren has to have everything just so - brush his teeth, give him his pacifier, change his diaper and pajamas and let him pick a book.  Then he crawls into bed, pulls his covers over his lap and pats his lap as he waits for his bedtime story.  Where he used to cry and carry on once you left the room, he's now fine as long as he gets an extra-long snuggle.  So after I turn on his fan, close his shades and turn off his light, I curl up with him and hold him snugly against my chest and kiss his cheeks and stroke his face.  He clutches the front of my shirt as if he wants to pull me even closer and I can feel him relax.  I'm honored and humbled to be that person who can calm him with just my presence.  I really do wish I could hold him all night, but I know the little guy needs his sleep to prepare for another energetic day. 

Sleeping Positions

I check on my kids before I go to bed because I need to calm my irrational fears and see with my own eyes that they're okay.  It's also a special time of day because no matter how much noise they had created in the hours leading up to bedtime, there's nothing more charming and heart-warming (and quieter!) than observing my kids during the only time of the day they ever sit still. 

 

With Soren, I get an extra treat when I poke my head in his room.  I get to see in what crazy position he's managed to fall asleep!

 

Sometimes he's actually in his bed...



 

Sometimes he just uses his mattress as a pillow...

Other times he plays so hard after lights out that he doesn't even make it back into bed.  Trust me, when we put him to bed, he's tucked in all snug as a bug and then this is how we find him. 

I've even seen Soren fast asleep with his little bottom propped up in the air.  I have no idea how babies manage to sleep like that, but he looked otherwise comfortable, so he clearly made it work.

Soren Update: 20 Months

The biggest milestone Soren experienced this past month was transitioning from his crib to his bed.  Actually, we ended up transitioning him much earlier than planned, so his "bed" is his crib mattress on the floor.  After my surgery, Chris and his parents were able to take care of the kids while I recovered, which was essential since I wasn't allowed to lift anything heavier than 10 pounds.  Oliver and Soren are self-sufficient enough that once I got through the worst of my recovery, I could take care of them as long as I didn't have to lift them.  The only solution to not having to lift Soren in and out of his crib seemed to be to eliminate the crib altogether.  In the 15 minutes it took to Chris to dismantle the crib and haul it down to the basement, Soren left another piece of babyhood behind.

Soren cried when we put him down in his new "bed" that first night, but he's been doing that a lot lately right at bedtime, so we weren't sure if his protesting was actually because he was not in his crib or not.  The only challenge we encountered was that Soren's bedroom door didn't latch and Soren discovered he was no longer contained in his room!  The first morning I found it cute when I rolled over and Soren was standing at my bedside and smiling at me from behind his pacifier.  And his crawling into bed with Oliver was ueber heart-warming.  But the morning I took five trips from my warm bed between 5:07 a.m. and 6:00 a.m. when I gave up fetching Soren from either the living room or the staircase was not stoking my motherly love.  I was frustrated, tired and also nervous that Soren would hurt himself since he was doing all this exploring in his sleepsack.  Soren spent the next few nights and naps in his pack 'n' play until Chris could fix the latch on the door and that solved the problem. 

Soren is getting more clever, beyond figuring out he can break out of his room. If he wants to get up on the couch, he knows he can fetch the little stool we have in the kitchen and bring it over to the couch to help him climb up.  When I wasn't allowed to lift him, I'd put the stool by his chair and he'd climb up into his booster seat with just a bit of assistance.

He's also in a testing boundaries phase. He likes a good chase, especially when Mom wants him to go one direction and he decides to go in the other. When he books down the sidewalk, I thought at first I could ignore him because he'd eventually become scared if got too far away from me. That tactic doesn't seem to work, so off I go after him. He's still got a bit of a yoda-like run, but he's still quick!

Soren is picking up a few more words, like "bubble" and "water".  But the sweetest new word is "Oliver" and he actually does quite a good job pronouncing it.  When we picked the name Oliver, we had no idea how difficult the letter "l" is for little kids to pronounce. 

When Soren gets really excited about something, such as the prospect of a snack, he flaps his arms up and down and bounces up and down.  But watch out, if for some reason he thinks the thing he was so excited about is not going to materialize, he starts bawling and it's a pitiful sight!

He picked up another random virus this past month, the third in two months.  He always had a really high fever for a couple of days, but not many other symptoms.  At the first visit they took his blood, a throat swab and then a urine sample.  The nurses gave him as much apple juice as he wanted, but it still took an hour and a half to get his sample and then the results came back showing nothing.  The second trip to the doctor came after his temperature approached 105.  I left work pronto and took him in and still just some random, unknown virus.  Yet another fever two weeks ago brought us back to the doctor, who diagnosed an ear infection.  I know this spate of illnesses could be a lot worse, but I'm hoping for a sickness-free stretch for the summer. 

What I realized I missed the most this past month was being able to pick up Soren up and cuddle him.  He's such an active toddler that unless I'm holding him, the cuddles and hugs on are on his terms.  We snuggled while reading stories, or he'd stop playing to get a reassuring hug from me, but he hardly stays still for long.  I used to cart him around the house on my hip and he loved being with me every moment he could.  I've been able to lift him more, but I'm afraid my days of Soren being my sidekick are behind me.