Anniversaries of bringing a new child home is not only marked by photos popping up from prior years on your Facebook wall, but by visits from your social worker. Ours came to our house last week for our one-year post-adoption visit. I spent much of the hour listing out all the procedures, surgeries and evaluations Kiera and Matteo have had in the six months since our last post-adoption visit as Ava, our social worker, tried to keep up jotting everything down in her notes. I talked about the challenges we've had and the unknowns we're still trying to sort out. Since we had last seen Ava six months ago and before that, shortly after we came home, she was able to remind me of how far we have come. Yes, we still have a longs ways to go, but look at what has changed in the last year. I received a huge compliment when Ava said she listened to me describe a challenge, but before she could offer some suggestions, I described how we were handling it and it was exactly as she would have advised.
I've enjoyed our post-adoption visits and was sad to learn that we won't be seeing Ava again. Due to a change by China in post-adoption reporting, the one-year post-adoption report is the last one that must be written by our social worker and we will be allowed to write the two-year-, three-year and five-year post-adoption reports ourselves.
Since our work with our home study agency is coming to a close, I would like to give International Adoption Services, and particularly, Ava, our social worker, a shout-out. If you live in the Twin Cities and need a home study, they're the ones to call.
Kiera, Matteo, Oliver and Soren
Showing posts with label Post-Adoption Report. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Post-Adoption Report. Show all posts
Saturday, March 5, 2016
Wednesday, July 29, 2015
Six-Month Post-Adoption Report
What a difference a couple of months makes. Back in February when our social worker visited us to complete our one-month post-adoption report, we were still adjusting to our new normal, just embarking on a never-ending series of doctors appointments and not sleeping much thanks to a someone who preferred sharing our bed over sleeping on his own. And yet we were doing so well that I assumed that things couldn't get any better.
Fast forward a couple of months and so much has changed. I've gone back to work, Kiera started preschool, Matteo had his palate repair and got cool new glasses, both kids stopped napping, everyone goes to bed in their own beds, and things are going even better. Our normal doesn't feel new anymore, it just feels, well, normal.
Our social worker asked if we had any questions for her, but we really didn't. It's not that everything is perfect - I don't feel like we're 100% there with attachment, both kids need speech therapy and we won't know for another couple of months whether Matteo needs a follow-up surgery on his palate. But we feel like we have a plan in place and are managing these issues just fine.
The only question I had was whether the agency ever hears back from the CCCWA regarding the post-adoption reports the social workers submit. Even though our social worker dutifully schedules the post-adoption visits, writes thorough reports and submits them on time, she never hears anything once she submits the reports. I like to think of the required post-adoption reports as a way of relaying information on the well-being of our children to all the people who cared for them before we met them, but I know the reality is that most likely no one but CCCWA officials has access to the reports. For all I know, they're never even read and collect dust on a shelf. Nonetheless I hope someone is reading all these reports and is comforted knowing that for China's children scattered across the world, they are so loved and well-cared by their new families.
Fast forward a couple of months and so much has changed. I've gone back to work, Kiera started preschool, Matteo had his palate repair and got cool new glasses, both kids stopped napping, everyone goes to bed in their own beds, and things are going even better. Our normal doesn't feel new anymore, it just feels, well, normal.
Our social worker asked if we had any questions for her, but we really didn't. It's not that everything is perfect - I don't feel like we're 100% there with attachment, both kids need speech therapy and we won't know for another couple of months whether Matteo needs a follow-up surgery on his palate. But we feel like we have a plan in place and are managing these issues just fine.
The only question I had was whether the agency ever hears back from the CCCWA regarding the post-adoption reports the social workers submit. Even though our social worker dutifully schedules the post-adoption visits, writes thorough reports and submits them on time, she never hears anything once she submits the reports. I like to think of the required post-adoption reports as a way of relaying information on the well-being of our children to all the people who cared for them before we met them, but I know the reality is that most likely no one but CCCWA officials has access to the reports. For all I know, they're never even read and collect dust on a shelf. Nonetheless I hope someone is reading all these reports and is comforted knowing that for China's children scattered across the world, they are so loved and well-cared by their new families.
Sunday, March 22, 2015
Post-Adoption Report Pictures
We need to submit eight pictures of each child for Kiera's and Matteo's one-month post-adoption reports. They're supposed to show what our children have been up to since joining our family and how they are doing. Since we haven't done a whole lot that's picture-worthy since coming home (we're supposed to be cocooning, and it's mostly been cold here in Minnesota), I've had to make a point to keep my camera on me and try to take pictures when we're out and about, or simply when I catch the kids in a good mood. My kids have heard way too many times, "Smile! I need a picture to send to China!"
When I finally uploaded all my photos onto my computer, I was combing through them when I came upon this one. This is what "real" siblings do, right?
Okay, really, I'm not going to let that one make the cut. Oliver and Soren actually play quite nicely with Kiera and Matteo and have been awesome big brothers. There were so many other pictures to chose from that it's going to be hard to narrow them down to just eight.
Matteo
Kiera
One day we were all sitting at the table eating when Oliver said out of the blue to me, "When you send those pictures to China, you need to tell them that Kiera and Matteo are really happy here and we love them very much."
I will certainly do that. I have no idea if their foster families will ever get any of the information from our post-adoption reports, but I asked our agency if they can at least make sure the families get the pictures of their former foster children. Kiera and Matteo were loved so much and if pictures say a thousand words, hopefully no translation is needed to convey that Kiera and Matteo are happy and they are loved.
When I finally uploaded all my photos onto my computer, I was combing through them when I came upon this one. This is what "real" siblings do, right?
Okay, really, I'm not going to let that one make the cut. Oliver and Soren actually play quite nicely with Kiera and Matteo and have been awesome big brothers. There were so many other pictures to chose from that it's going to be hard to narrow them down to just eight.
Matteo
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| Clockwise from top left: 1. Guangzhou. 2. Playing with blocks at home. 3. Guangzhou. 4. Choo Choo Bob's train store. |
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| Clockwise from top left: 1. Cruising the hospital in his car before his cleft palate surgery. 2. Family picture on Kiera's birthday. 3. Going for a walk pushing three kiddos. 4. Every time he sees the camera, he throws his arm around Kiera for a picture. |
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| Clockwise from top left: 1. Matteo wearing his big brothers' hand-me-down overalls. 2. Donning their junior firefighters hats on a trip to our local fire station. 3. Posing with their siblings, friends and two friendly firefighters at the end of our tour of the fire station. |
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| Clockwise from top left: 1. Kids love carrying their stuff in bags. 2. Snuggled up for a cold winter's walk. 3. All four siblings "smile" for the camera at the Minnesota Children's Museum. 4. Matteo "helped" me bake. |
Kiera
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| Clockwise from top left: 1. Kiera and Matteo "helped" me bake. 2. Getting her teeth cleaned at the dentist. 3. Playing with trains at Choo Choo Bob's train store. 4. Getting a loving hug from Matteo while playing blocks. |
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| Clockwise from top left: 1. Kiera on her third birthday. 2. Wearing the birthday crown Oliver made her while everyone sang Happy Birthday to her. 3. Riding in a wagon at Grandma and Grandpa's house. 4. Trying on her new shades from Uncle Andy and Aunt Danielle. |
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| Clockwise from top left: 1. Guangzhou. 2. Kiera with Matteo and Daddy in Guangzhou. 3. Family picture on Kiera's birthday. 4. Matteo and Kiera. |
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| Kiera had no fear jumping into the ball pit. As you can see, she loved it! |
I will certainly do that. I have no idea if their foster families will ever get any of the information from our post-adoption reports, but I asked our agency if they can at least make sure the families get the pictures of their former foster children. Kiera and Matteo were loved so much and if pictures say a thousand words, hopefully no translation is needed to convey that Kiera and Matteo are happy and they are loved.
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
One-Month Post-Adoption Report
The China Center for Children's Welfare and Adoption (CCCWA) requires families to submit six post-adoption reports over the course of five years. Counting from the day the adoption is finalized in China, (January 27th for Matteo and February 3 for Kiera) reports are due to the CCCWA at one month, six months, twelve months, two years, three years and five years post-adoption. (If you received your travel approval January 1, 2015 or later, the one-month post-adoption report is replaced by a four-year report.) The first three must be written by a social worker; the last three by the families. Reports, along with eight photos depicting the child's life, are submitted to the placing agency, who then submits them to the CCCWA.
Thankfully both our placing agency and home study agency were on top of things and contacted us about scheduling a meeting, because the post-adoption report was the last thing on my mind when I returned. And thankfully we like our social worker because she'll be in our lives for awhile, something I didn't fully appreciate when post-adoption seemed like a stage we were never going to make it to.
Our social worker came over to our house and took notes while the kids played and I talked about how things have been going. I talked about our time in China, meeting Matteo and Kiera for the first time, how the bonding process is going, what Oliver and Soren think of everything, how we're all sleeping, the doctor's appointments I've lined up and pretty much everything that's happened in the month since we've known these two. I was happy to report that they're healthy (the need for palate surgery and ear tubes aside), eating well, sleeping (reasonably) well, well-behaved (for now) and just generally happy kids. I recounted how I marveled at how two kids could take such interest in books despite not having held a book up until a month ago, or their curiosity and how they know how to play.
Our concerns are few. We hope that ear tubes solve the kids' speech delays, but for now, that's in the doctors' hands. We wish we were sleeping better, but our social worker confirmed that what we're experiencing is normal and that how we're addressing it and coping with it are reasonable in the context of a newly-adopted child. The emotional issue for me is attachment. We're seeing signs in Kiera of "indiscriminate friendliness," which means she treats strangers the same way she treats us, her mom and dad. I'm hoping this is more a reflection of Kiera's calm and friendly personality and the fact we're still so new to her that she's still sorting out who is who in her life, and that with time, she will form a healthy attachment to Chris and me. But when Kiera picks up a book, flips it open to a picture of a woman, says, "Mama" and points to our social worker, I know we have a long way to go. In the meantime, our social worker reinforced that we should continue what we've been doing, which is being the only ones who pick up Kiera, hug her, snuggle with her, feed her and generally meet all her physical and emotional needs. For the time-being, everyone else should continue to direct her back to us no matter how cute she looks with her outstretched arms and eyes that plead, "Pick me up!"
Overall, though, I can't emphasize enough how well things are otherwise going. As our social worker watched Kiera and Matteo dump the contents of all the toys baskets onto the living room floor and explore and play, she remarked how calm and comfortable they seem. She thought we were all adjusting well to becoming a family. Barely one month in, this is what becoming a family looks like. Toy-strewn floor and all.
Thankfully both our placing agency and home study agency were on top of things and contacted us about scheduling a meeting, because the post-adoption report was the last thing on my mind when I returned. And thankfully we like our social worker because she'll be in our lives for awhile, something I didn't fully appreciate when post-adoption seemed like a stage we were never going to make it to.
Our social worker came over to our house and took notes while the kids played and I talked about how things have been going. I talked about our time in China, meeting Matteo and Kiera for the first time, how the bonding process is going, what Oliver and Soren think of everything, how we're all sleeping, the doctor's appointments I've lined up and pretty much everything that's happened in the month since we've known these two. I was happy to report that they're healthy (the need for palate surgery and ear tubes aside), eating well, sleeping (reasonably) well, well-behaved (for now) and just generally happy kids. I recounted how I marveled at how two kids could take such interest in books despite not having held a book up until a month ago, or their curiosity and how they know how to play.
Our concerns are few. We hope that ear tubes solve the kids' speech delays, but for now, that's in the doctors' hands. We wish we were sleeping better, but our social worker confirmed that what we're experiencing is normal and that how we're addressing it and coping with it are reasonable in the context of a newly-adopted child. The emotional issue for me is attachment. We're seeing signs in Kiera of "indiscriminate friendliness," which means she treats strangers the same way she treats us, her mom and dad. I'm hoping this is more a reflection of Kiera's calm and friendly personality and the fact we're still so new to her that she's still sorting out who is who in her life, and that with time, she will form a healthy attachment to Chris and me. But when Kiera picks up a book, flips it open to a picture of a woman, says, "Mama" and points to our social worker, I know we have a long way to go. In the meantime, our social worker reinforced that we should continue what we've been doing, which is being the only ones who pick up Kiera, hug her, snuggle with her, feed her and generally meet all her physical and emotional needs. For the time-being, everyone else should continue to direct her back to us no matter how cute she looks with her outstretched arms and eyes that plead, "Pick me up!"
Overall, though, I can't emphasize enough how well things are otherwise going. As our social worker watched Kiera and Matteo dump the contents of all the toys baskets onto the living room floor and explore and play, she remarked how calm and comfortable they seem. She thought we were all adjusting well to becoming a family. Barely one month in, this is what becoming a family looks like. Toy-strewn floor and all.
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